In training

Moving to Tumblr

2011-05-26T10:30:00.000-07:00

Hi:)

I am moving my blog to Tumblr because I can do more stuff with it there.

The new blog is at http://livingintraining.tumblr.com/

Hope everyone follows!!!

Stuff for Our Puppy

2011-05-24T15:22:00.001-07:00

So I have a list of items that we will need for Reese's when we finally get her. I want to make sure that we have everything she will need so we don't have to panic over not having something important, i.e. a leash, chew toys, water bowls. Also, I figure that spreading out the costs over the next month is better than having to buy everything at once too:/

Currently, this puppy is already almost set:) I think I mentioned earlier that I had purchased her orange collar which says "R. Bilicke" on it. Today during my lunch break, I went to PetSmart and picked up a few more items. I got her some toys and some other important things. I had a pretty good idea of what items I wanted, because our friends gave us some great Retriever tips over the weekend.

These are the toys/Kong. They are made for extreme chewing, which I know will be good for our lab. The blue bone is supposed to be great because it is hard but chewing at the same time. The red toy is a tough squeaky toy. I'm not sure if it will last for long, but I couldn't resist getting her something fun like that. Then the Kong is supposed to be a fantastic occupier for her. You put a treat in it, and they will play with it for a long time:) Hopefully these items will help her not chew on other things. We also have quite a few tennis balls for some fun games of fetch with her:) Between the playtime and chew toys, I am hoping to wear her out each night haha.

These are the more serious items for Reese's. I bought her the steel water bowl for outside so she won't be tempted to chew on it. Then for her food bowl, I got her a sturdy plastic bowl which has worked well for other dogs. I also bought her a brown leash so it matches her chocolate fur:) The last item I got is pretty great, I must say. It is a 2-in-1 portable food and water bowl. Our friends had this and I thought it was great. It allows you to store the dog food in the top half of the bag and as you and your dog are out and about (say on a hike), you can feed it or more importantly give it water.

So those are the latest items for Reese's.

Reese's

2011-05-24T08:28:00.000-07:00

So I have mentioned a couple times that we are getting a Chocolate Lab in a few weeks. We have named her Reese's (like our favorite candy) and are excitingly waiting for her arrival. She is currently only 3 weeks old but has already started walking around. From what I have heard, she is growing extremely fast - we are going to have a big puppy on our hands:) Becky (Reese's breeder) has been great, giving me often updates because she knows how excited I am haha. She has also been sending periodic pictures showing Reese's growth process which I absolutely love seeing!! Here are a couple of her (kind of her, possibly her - all the females have looked the same thus far haha).

A few days old (how cute are her ears!!)
The girls (I think the one on the left was telling them to sit still)

Week 2 (She's grown so much already- look cute is her tail!?)

So I will post more as I get them. I'm already completely smitten with Reese's and I haven't even met her yet!

Birthday man

2011-05-23T15:48:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday was Bryan's birthday. We had a nice day with a quiet morning (we did some yard work haha) and a fun afternoon/evening with his best friend, Dave and his wife, Kris. We had lunch and then the guys played some golf, while Kris and I bonded over some shopping - she got me to try on a dress, actually 2, so we must have bonded because I DON'T do that haha. They have an adorable Golden Retriever who is a year old, so we talked a lot about puppies and got a lot of great information. Anyways, after that we went back home and barbecued. It was nice:)

My baby is a pretty awesome guy. I love being his wife and I can't wait for the many more years to come. Life is good being a Bilicke. Happy Birthday, My Love:)

New House!

2011-05-22T20:54:00.000-07:00

We are finally in our new house! After the constant highs and lows of about 5 months of looking and one month of escrow, we did it! We are finally in our house. We moved in last weekend so have had the joy of living in our new home for 1 week now. With the much appreciated help of our family, we were able to move and completely unpack in one weekend. It was great and we are very thankful!

Our house is awesome! We absolutely love it! It is in a great location for us and in a pretty decent neighborhood too:) We seem to have some nice neighbors and a lot of parks and hiking literally within 5 minutes of walking from our door step. The house is a 2 bedroom, 2 bath with 2 patios. The previous owners just put in the brand new energy efficient windows which are awesome and we have tile throughout the house, with floating wood floors in the bedrooms. The bathrooms are updated with the Home Depot items that we had been eying so that is awesome too!! We decided we wanted to splurge a little, so we purchased brand new stainless steel appliances which look amazing. We are so happy with everything!!

We even got to puppy test out the house yesterday, when some friends of ours came over with their year old Golden Retriever. The house passed with flying colors and is ready for our 3 week old Chocolate Lab puppy, Reese's, who will finally come home to us in about a month when she is old enough to leave her mommy. (Aaaaahhhhh it feels like such a long time!!!) Anyways, things will work great for her here=)

So that is the homestead update=) We bought it- We love it- We are happy!

Here are some pictures=)

New Season

2011-05-04T16:53:00.000-07:00

Over the last few months, there have been some great things and some iffy "lifeish" things that have happened in the Bilicke household but overall, things are going pretty well. Marriage is still such a blessing and every day is a pleasant adventure with each other as we grow together as husband and wife. A new season has begun in our lives as Bryan and I will be moving into our new home next week. This is a pretty big accomplishment and it has been interesting to see just how specific God's hand guided us to our new home by closing many doors and opening a few doors to allow us to finally get into our new house. We have been looking for a house since the beginning January and had a few disappointments along the way - house hunting is not as easy as it appears on House Hunters or My First Place or any of the other house hunting shows on HGTV. The reality of house hunting is that one shouldn't get attached to any place until escrow closes. That may sound dreary but it is just safer that way because otherwise you are faced with constant highly emotional "ups" and "downs." That is rough to say the least - yes, unfortunately I had to learn the hard way, but once I learned it, I learned it! Now you may say "Brooke, you guys haven't closed escrow yet. You still have a few days left - why are you attached to your place now?" Well, my answer is that while something weird could hypothetically happen, we should be okay because we have already passed the inspection, the appraisal, and the loan approval process. In fact, we have already signed the final paper work. We are literally waiting for the keys now so that is why I feel comfortable talking about the house. Honestly though, while I have been excited about this house, I have kept the possibilities of anything happening open in my mind. Thankfully, nothing has happened and we will get the keys after this weekend:)

Our house is really cute, having just over 900 sq ft of living space. Yes, it is small (haha) but actually it is perfect for us right now. It is a 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom house and has updated features. We purchased all brand new stainless steel appliances a few months ago (in anticipation), so it will be nice to finally be able to use them! The bedrooms are good sizes, and house has a lot of light that pours in from the brand new energy efficient windows. It's funny because the previous owners updated the house pretty much exactly how we were planning on updating whatever house we thought we would end up in. Now we don't have too - except that we might replace the master shower and put in a brand new tile shower. But that isn't really super important right now. Anyways, the yard is really cute too. The front has a nice piece of grass in it with a large shade tree, and the rest of the yard is mostly concrete with a small piece of grass in the backyard. It will be really easy to maintain. I can't wait to plant flowers in all of the flower beds! Anyways, we are really proud of it. It reminds me of a cozy beach cottage - that is not at the beach haha:) I will post pictures of it once we get settled.

On top of buying a new house, we are also adding the first member to our family, Reese's, our new chocolate Labrador Retriever puppy who will be coming to us once she is old enough to be separated from her mommy. As I write, she is only 4 days old - She was born on May 1st:) I can not wait to meet her in person!! I will obviously also post pictures of her as soon as we get her:)

So anyways, those are the newest happenings in the life of the Bilicke's. I must say that it is a pretty fun time right now:)

My Husband

2011-03-28T08:26:00.001-07:00

This weekend was a nice and quiet weekend around the Bilicke homestead. We did a few things, but mostly just hung out and relaxed. Sunday we slept in and went to church. The message was on 1 Corinthians 7:1-9 which is about marriage. We left feeling encouraged and talked about the message and our church for most of the drive home. I am very thankful that we get to go to Calvary Chapel Chino Hills. We have an amazing pastor who loves Jesus and teaches about all the topics in the Bible, even when they are awkward or tough.

Anyways, the rest of the day we just lounged around and hung out. I love that. I get to hang out with my best friend every day; he really has become my best friend. I get to share everything with him; all my joys, all my worries, all my quirks, my dreams, my hopes, etc. etc. He always responds by encouraging me, laughing with me and even just being silent when I need him too. I am so blessed to have Bryan as my husband. He is an amazing man and an amazing husband. He is responsible and takes care of me - not in the "he does everything for us way" but rather he is constantly looking out for things that are important for my/our well being (even as simple as not letting me try the Costco samples because I am allergic to them haha), and makes wise and careful decisions about our life (like choosing what we can afford in a house so we won't go broke). We never fight and living with him brings peace to my life. I feel incredibly safe and protected with him. He gentle and caring. He loves Jesus and that transfers into how he interacts with everyone around him. I am truly blessed by him. When we got engaged and then married, I didn't really understand how I could grow more in love with him. Now even though we have just been married for a little more than a year, I can now see how it is possible. I actually do love Bryan more every day and it always blows my mind. It's pretty amazing, especially when I try to imagine what it will be like 30 years from now, Lord willing. I really can't imagine how awesome it will be. We will have both grown individually, as well as together. We will have amazing memories, a family of our own, and many life experiences. I am really excited about that and loving every day as we continue in our life together. I can't believe God blessed me with Bryan!

House hunt

2011-02-09T13:07:00.001-08:00

I haven't had as much time lately because in the midst of work, school and normal life things, we are house hunting. We hope to find something soon. We are looking for a 3 bedroom, 2 Bath single family residence or condo/townhouse in the Ontario area near the 10, 15, and 60 freeways. We'll see what happens!

1 year Wedding Anniversary

2011-01-19T12:41:00.000-08:00

So last Sunday, January 16th, Bryan and I had our one year wedding anniversary. I must admit that I got a little excited - which I wasn't expecting because I didn't think it would be that big of a deal but it turned out that it was really special and fun to be able to say "happy anniversary" and "we've been married for a year now:)" On Saturday, we went to Disneyland which was really fun. The cast at Disneyland really makes you feel special when you have an anniversary. They gave us buttons and pretty much all employees say "Happy Anniversary" to you and some ask you questions about it:) It was pretty cool. Then Sunday, we went to church and then had lunch with my parents. That was nice:) While we were eating, my mom asked us what advice we would give to others who are getting married now that we have been married for a year....so I have been thinking about it and thought I would blog about it.

First off, Bryan's advice:

He thought it was important to tell people who are considering getting married to pick who they marry wisely. He explained that he has seen a lot of guys (but this can go for girls too) who try way to hard to get people to date and eventually marry them. For example, some guys will show up to every date with flowers, a box of candy, and a teddy bear. While that might actually be something that some guys like to do, others will do it just to impress the girl. In reality, they can't continue doing it for long and that is why you hear people say things like "the magic left after we got married." So basically: if you want to get married, be yourself and do not do things that you can not keep on doing forever. Sometimes it is good to do something special but if your whole relationship has been based upon you doing something you can't keep up, its not going to end well.

Bryan said he picked wisely because I was really easy to impress and he didn't have to do anything haha.

My advice/thoughts:

1st: Be a team and be one with each other. When you get married, you cease to be a "you" and you become an "us." That is Biblical. People who say that you need to be be your own individual within a marriage are not supporting the "oneness" concept of marriage. If you are constantly thinking about how you can be a "you" within your marriage, you are not going to be focusing on how to be an "us." Like the saying goes, there is no "I" in team. When Bryan and I got married, I stopped being "Brooke Schumacher" and Bryan stopped being "bachelor Bryan Bilicke." We became "Brooke and Bryan Bilicke." That doesn't mean that we can't like or dislike the same things but it does mean that we operate as one unit. This is the only way to have a successful marriage. Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Seattle explained this well when he said that he and his wife are so close and so much of an one unit that he does not know where she stops and he begins in every aspect of their lives. That is the goal of marriage in our opinion. (A special note: in order to be one with your spouse, you must believe that divorce is not an option. That means that A: it isn't an option; and B: you don't talk, threat or joke about divorce. When you say "I do," you are in it until death. Otherwise, you are signed up for heartache.)

2nd: Marriage does not have to be hard. Life for us after our wedding has been really easy and pleasant actually. We both prefer being married far more than being single. Any major problems that we have had to deal with haven't even had to do with our marriage and we have handled them as a team. I believe that you can make a conscious decision to have a peaceful marriage. Both Bryan and I have done that and I think it has paid off. We really like each other and there is no reason to mess that up.

3rd: You don't have to fight. I think there is this misconception that married people have to fight about everything big and little and that is just not true. Once again, its a choice you have to make. For Bryan and I, we really do not fight or disagree at all - it really is rare. Sometimes we have disagreements but those are usually fixed very quickly or after we have some quiet time to think about it by ourselves. After that, one of us will approach the other and we will calmly talk about the problem and resolve it. A major thing is that we do not go to bed angry with each other. Why go to bed angry and upset with the person you share a bed with? Then your whole night is ruined by being upset and not being able to sleep.

4th: Say you are wrong if you are wrong and be understanding with your spouse if they are trying to say sorry. That's pretty self explanatory. Say you are sorry and don't beat up your spouse if they say they were wrong. You shouldn't kick each other when you are down.

5th: Focus on the things that you love about your spouse and be actively thankful for them. Every morning on my way to work I spend my drive time praying. The first person I pray for is Bryan. In this time, I thank God for him and pray for our marriage. This time has been a blessing to my heart as during the time that I am praying for him and us, God has shown me really neat things about Bryan and our relationship that make me even more thankful for him.

6th: Tell your spouse that you love them and tell them how thankful you are for them, that you are glad that you married them or that they are special to you. Do this often! These things bless your spouse and I think help you grow in intimacy.

7th: Smile at each other. As simple as this is, being friendly towards your spouse is good!

8th: Have fun with each other. Joke around, laugh with each other, go on dates, talk about the future and make plans with each other. Along with not being difficult, marriage can be really fun:)

So those are some of my thoughts on marriage after one year. Bryan and I really love being married and encourage everyone to do it!

I want to be different

2011-01-07T08:19:00.000-08:00

Over that last couple of weeks I keep hearing people talk about resolutions they are making for 2011. It has made me think about some things. Sure I could make "deals with myself" for the next year and most likely break them all. Some things I've heard would be:

I want to be a better cook. I want to be rich. I want to work out more often. I want to become famous. I want to take a class on some interest that I have. I want to hike in the Grand Canyon. I want to travel more. I want to impress others. I want to have more fun. I want to be the best at something. I want to find that special "someone." I want to practice a certain skill set faithfully, etc etc.... Some of these are perfectly fine and perhaps even good things to strive for.

But - does it really matter? I'm not saying that being healthy and practicing things and having fun and accomplishing goals isn't good. But what I have been thinking about is that most of these things aren't going to last and yet, people spend so much time and energy trying to accomplish these earthly goals. The point is, what are we doing that will actually last forever? We should live life to the fullest but at what point do we live life to the fullest and forget about living life for eternity?

Essentially, you and I are dirt clods. Our bodies are made from the components found in dirt which makes complete sense because God created us from, dirt. Genesis 2:7 says "And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being." When we die, we turn back into dirt. Everything we have stays here on earth when we die. Fame, fortune, experiences - they all stay behind. The only thing that you and I get to "take" with us, is the record of all that we have done, good or bad, holy or unholy.

In thinking about this, it seems that I should work on my eternal life more than this earthly life. In doing that, I will actually be living this life to the absolute fullest. The purpose of life is to glorify God. If you are not doing that, you are not living life to the fullest. You could have everything in the world, all the fame and fortune and opportunities and yet, you would still be living an unfulfilled life. I would rather be a poor, unknown, simple person living life for Jesus, than the person in the previous sentence. The scary thing is that even Christians can not be living life to the fullest. Instead of living life for Jesus, they pursue things like money, or fame, or personal relationships with other people and not Jesus. I've done this before. I've gotten into the mindset of pursuing earthly treasures more than pursuing Heavenly treasures. As Christians, when you and I die, we will be rewarded by Jesus with Heavenly crowns based upon what we did on earth that was to His glory. These crowns are going to be amazing. We will then, in an act of worship, lay back down our crowns at Jesus' feet. The question is do you want a little crown to lay at Jesus' feet or a big, huge, crazy sized crown to lay at His feet? Remember that He is Jesus! The KING of the Universe and all that is! I want a freakin huge crown to give Him!

That brings me to this:

My desire for this year and every year after that is that I would change and become more like Jesus. I don't want to be a carnal Christian living for things of this world, instead of Him. I want to become more like Jesus. I want to be more loving. I want to be less agitated by things that I believe to be stupid. I want to pursue Jesus and get to know Him better. I want to be more kind. I want to have more patience. I want to become wise, not with worldly wisdom, but with Biblical wisdom because it is actually God's wisdom - the Bible is His Word and is everything that was in God's heart that He wanted to tell us. I want to cultivate a tender heart so I can be more teachable. The list goes on... It is a good thing I have the rest of my life to work on this. My goal for today is that on January 7, 2012, I will be a more Christlike Brooke Bilicke than I am today. Then, on January 7, 2013, I hope that I will be a more Christlike Brooke Bilicke than I am on January 7, 2012. I guess the goal for each year is that I become more and more like Jesus and less and less like Brooke Bilicke. I want people to see Jesus when they look at me, not me.

So that is what I have been thinking about for the last few weeks...

Christmas

2010-12-22T19:18:00.000-08:00

It's almost Christmas! What a wonderful day to celebrate!

Christmas is the celebration of Jesus' birth. Often we can get caught up in the "birth" aspect of the day but in reality it is so much more! Yes, Christmas celebrates Jesus' birth but we must remember that His birth signifies His coming down from Heaven to save the world! That was the whole point of His birth. Jesus came to die for all of humanity so that we would have to choice to be saved from certain destruction. Jesus died because no person is perfect and only perfection can be in Heaven with God for eternity. If a person does not choose to be saved from their imperfection or sin, they are doomed to eternal death. So God sent Jesus, His one and only Son, to come down from Heaven to die for all of the sin and imperfections of mankind. Then Jesus rose from the grave, achieving victory over death. This allowed any person who wishes to be saved from their own destruction to have the ability to be saved by having faith that Jesus died for their sins. Jesus left earth to go be with God, the Father but left the Holy Spirit to reside with those who choose to believe in Him. As a person puts their faith in Jesus to save their soul, the Holy Spirit comes and lives in their heart. You might be thinking, "wait? Who is the Father, who is Jesus, and who is the Holy Spirit? This is a common question and one that can be difficult to explain and understand. The best way I can answer that is that they are God. The Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit are all God. We know God as the Trinity, meaning "three in one." Think of it like an apple. You have the apple skin, the apple flesh, and the apple core. You don't think of each part individually though - you think of all three parts as one apple. That is kind of how God is. God is One person but He is made up of three parts. The Father resides in Heaven. Jesus is the Father's One and Only Son sent to save mankind. And the Holy Spirit is the part of God that lives inside His Followers. Jesus gave us His Holy Spirit (Acts 1:6-9) which fulfills His promise that He will never leave us or forsake us (Duet 31:6). This is how God transforms our lives. He lives in us! How can we remain the same with Christ in us!?

Anyway, It is a lot to explain in this short Christmas post, but I would encourage all to think about the real meaning of Christmas. It is to celebrate Jesus, the Savior's, birth. There is no other reason for Christmas - Christmas is about Jesus. Don't miss out!

Jesus is amazing! If you want to meet Him, I would encourage you to read the Bible. Start with the book of Matthew and the book of Romans. These are excellent and will explain everything.

Merry Christmas!

Love and Marriage

2010-12-15T14:35:00.000-08:00

I was listening to a sermon on the radio today and it was about marriage and love. It got me thinking. As a spouse, it should be your goal to out-love your wife or husband and not demand that they do the same in return. That means that you do as much as you can for your spouse without expecting or counting the things that they do in return for you. If a person is busy counting the ways that their spouse loves them, I guarantee that they are not actively attempting to love their spouse and more than likely, they will be unhappy and disappointed with their spouse. In my opinion, if someone is unhappy with their spouse, they need to stop focusing on what is wrong with their spouse, and they need to start looking at themselves instead. A person who is busy trying to be the best wife or husband they can be, will not have time to focus on the negatives in their marriage. An important factor for a successful marriage is to take responsibility for your own role in your marriage. That means if you are a wife, it is your responsibility to be the best wife ever and not worry about how good of a husband your husband is being - and vise versa.

Thanksgiving

2010-12-02T15:31:00.001-08:00

This year we had two Thanksgivings. My parents and sister were at both:) The first was spent with my mom's side of the family, the Mahoods. It is always fun because every time we go to one of my aunts' houses or my Grandpa's house, I am reminded where I get my loud laugh from. It makes me smile and I feel right at home even though I don't see them that often. But seriously, my mom and her sisters are very loud haha. She has 5 sisters, so for a total of 6 girls under one roof, they grew up having to be loud in order to be heard...and they all laugh just like me:) Below is a picture of all of them from last Christmas. They were trying to sit in the same order as the picture behind them that was taken when they were teenagers:)The second Thanksgiving was spent with my new family, the Bilickes. They are pretty awesome:) I finally have the brother I've always wanted with Bryan's brother, Don, and I got an extra sister too with Don's wife, Rachel, aaand on top of that I get to be an aunt to Emily which I have always wanted to be! Plus I got some pretty sweet in-laws with Bryan's dad, Bob, and his wife, Margie:) They are the coolest and have taught me a lot about what it means to be hospitable. It is always such a joy and so encouraging to see them:) So anyway, second thanksgiving - we went to Don and Rachel's house. Bob and Margie and one of Margie's daughters and her friend came too. Also, like I said above my parents and sister came too which was really cool:) I like that they all get to hang out together:) It was a nice little get together. Rachel made the turkey, which was delicious, and some other things too. I made my yummy garlic mashed potatoes that give you a heart attack just by looking at them haha. And everyone else brought other good side dishes too. Oh! And Don made me - wait for it - Gluten Free Cupcakes!!!!!!!!! They were soooo good and fluffy and delicious!! They had a butter cream frosting and mmmmmm! I could live off of those haha. Bryan was worried because they didn't even taste like they were gluten free but they were:) That was probably the best part of Thanksgiving haha. Kidding, kinda... Here is a picture of most of us (and my grandpa and his wife) from Father's Day when we all went go-carting together. That was a fun trip!

Yes, the holiday season is here. Saturday, we are having the big Bilicke family Christmas Party at Bob and Margie's house. It is really fun:) It's cool having big family get togethers...it feels more like the holidays when there are a lot of people who all care about each other:)

So in spirit of last week's Thanksgiving, I am very thankful for my family:)

Here is another picture of my niece, Emily, because she is the cutest thing ever:) This is what she looks most of the time unless she is tired haha. At 8 months now, she is constantly laughing and smiling :) If it is this much fun to watch her grow up, I can't even imagine what it will be like to have our own!

Beauty

2010-11-11T08:04:00.000-08:00

Days like this are so wonderful! The sky is crystal clear, the wind is blowing, the leaves so beautiful as they get tossed around the earth. I can't help but feel like yelling "God, you are AMAZING!" ....and the beauty in our earth doesn't even do Him justice!

If you call a dog's tale "a leg," how many legs does it have? My thoughts on atheism

2010-11-02T10:36:00.000-07:00

I'm sort of encouraged in a weird way, but extremely saddened too. Someone decided to block me from their life because I took a stand for and am not ashamed of Truth and Jesus. I'm encouraged because the Bible tells me that men will hate me because of my relationship with God (Matt 10:22). I must be doing something right when my atheist friend decides he can't handle me anymore because I won't shut up about Jesus. Let me clarify: I don't recommend being offensive to non-believers in general because we are called to love others, but sometimes it is appropriate; especially when the person attempts to deny God's existence when they grew up being taught the Truth. I look at Jesus' example. He loved the sinners; He ate with them, He lived with them, and they grew to love Him. But when it came to the Pharisees, He was harsh with them, because they knew the Truth but denied its power. In my interactions with non-believers, I hope I reflect Jesus example with the non-believers. Sometimes though, it seems necessary to call out those pretending just like Jesus did with the Pharisees.

This brings me to my thoughts about atheism. It is an attempt to live in a pretend world. Not even a fun one if you really think about it. There is no hope for anything but the current world we live in today....which pretty much sucks. "What, atheist? You choose to believe that there is nothing but this world? This world: complete with death, pain, loneliness, hurt, murder, rape, injustice, etc. Do I care to join? I think not! No, I'd rather be my stupid Christian self, depending on God and believing in His promises of a beautiful and blessed life after this one, thank you very much."

People trying to be atheists have a problem when Christians say "feel free to believe what you wish, you have that right, however God does exist and you will answer to Him whether you believe in Him or not." I heard the following example of this attitude:

If you call a dog's tale "a leg," how many legs does it have? Most people say "5." "False" is the reply.

The point is, even if you call a dog's tale "a leg," its tale is still a tale, not a leg.

The same applies to atheists. They can pretend that God does not exist all they like; the problem is, He does exist and no matter how hard they pretend or say that they believe he does not exist, He still does.

This makes me sad, especially when atheist friends decide that they simply can't handle hearing the Truth anymore and they choose to eliminate any conflicting individuals from their lives. I guess I understand though. To be honest, I have a really hard time being around atheists and I don't hang out them often. My soul aches for them and wishes to yell and demand that they see the Truth. It is hard to face someone who is most certainly choosing Hell, especially when they have heard the Truth already. I don't understand it. I, along with millions of other people, have experienced Jesus and know without any doubt that He is real and He is God. He has answered my prayers and He has changed my life. My soul is secure in knowing Him. I have an undeniable relationship with God and to hear someone try to say that He does not exist makes me sad because they will never experience the joy of a very true relationship. While atheists attempt to argue that God does not exist, it is simply because they deny God access to their lives. They think that if they ignore Him, He will not ask them to surrender their lives to Him. The problem with this thinking is that they simply do not have a choice. God created them and He does own them. Within that, God desires that we choose Him back. Atheists think that by pretending He doesn't exist, they will not have to make that decision. In reality, they have already and have chosen poorly.

You may say "man, Brooke! You sure hate atheists." That is not the case at all. My issue is that I am deeply saddened and distraught for these individuals. In a world that shouts the existence of God, they have attempted to ignore Him and in that they are choosing death. I wish I could choose for them, but I don't get to do that. It is simply up to them to choose Jesus. Their stubbornness has caused them to miss out on the most incredible experience of this life: knowing Christ. That is the point I wish to make.

There is hope for the current atheist, just as there is hope for the rest of the world. God loves you very much. He provided a way to be saved from this miserable world and death by sending His Son, Jesus to die in your place. He then raised Him from the grave and defeated death. All you have to do is confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that He was raised from the grave. By doing that, you will be secured from death. You can begin to experience the relationship with Jesus that has changed and blessed so many. He loves you and wants to have a relationship with you. That is all.

If you decide to make that choice to believe in Jesus, you should get involved in a Bible believing and teaching church and start reading a Bible. Read through the New Testament first and then go through the Old Testament. This will help give you a really good understanding of what having a relationship with Jesus is about.

To my Christian friends.....

2010-10-26T18:01:00.001-07:00

Christians should not be politically correct. If you truly believe in the God of the Bible you need to stand up for what is right and not worry about people liking you. We've already been told that the world will hate us in Matthew 10:22 (and multiple other passages) when it says "and you will be hated by all for My name’s sake. But he who endures to the end will be saved." We are supposed to be narrow-minded in regards to calling sin, sin! That does not mean becoming legalistic in your thinking. It does however mean, that we are supposed to live by what the Bible says. When it says something is sin, it is sin. Remember Matthew 7:13 which says “Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it." Do not be mislead into thinking that you can support the evils of this world and not be held accountable by God. Christ followers are to be narrow-mined in regards to salvation. There is only One Way and that way is through accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior. Yes, we are called to love others but more importantly, we are called to stand up for Christ and His Word. That means taking stands against things that are not of the Bible like abortion and homosexuality (and any kind of sex outside of the Biblical definition of marriage which equals one Man and one Woman).

You can follow Jesus' example of this. He loved the sinner but hated the sin. As Christians, it is easy to forget that we are exactly the same as any other sinner and we can fall into equating the sinner as the sin. We can act hateful and unkindly towards unbelievers. I'm guilty of it. That in itself is sin. Yes, they are lost, but the only difference between them and us is that we have accepted the Saving Grace offered to all.

I must add that if you are a Christian and are not sure of what is actually sin (or why certain things like abortion or homosexuality are sin) because this world has clouded and muddied and misinterpreted the Bible, read it for yourself and if you are still having trouble understanding why something is sin, ask a Bible believing pastor or a strong, seasoned Bible believing Christian to explain it. Do not be mislead and test everything by the Bible.

The point is this Christian, if the world hates you, so be it. You will not be answering to them at the end of your life. You will be answering to God.

A final note: As voting season is upon us, consider this: Vote Biblically, not politically correct or for your pocket book. If we put people into office who will support Godly values, the rest will fall into place because "When the righteous triumph, there is great elation; but when the wicked rise to power, men go into hiding." Proverbs 28:12.

Son of Hamas

2010-09-30T16:41:00.000-07:00

So I just read the book, Son of Hamas, written by Mosab Hassan Yousef, a Muslim who has an amazing story. This book gives an interesting perspective on the Islamic religion from someone who grew up in that culture and was raised in the unfortunate circumstances that surround the people of the Middle East today. I appreciated how Mosab explained both sides of the problems that are the reality for the people. I found Mosab's story to be completely captivating and couldn't put the book down - I read it in one sitting. I highly recommend this book to anyone interested in facts surrounding the Middle East.

Here is a link to Mosab's Web site.

My niece

2010-09-20T08:34:00.000-07:00

My niece is pretty much the cutest baby ever. Margie took some pictures of her and I couldn't resist putting a few on here.

This is Emily:)

This is her classic look (haha). She's very serious sometimes haha.
She's such a pretty baby:) She smiles all the time now haha. It's so much fun!
I love this one some much! Anyway, Ems is the best. It is amazing how fast she has grown in such a short time.

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God's Patience

2010-09-15T10:25:00.000-07:00

"It happened on the same night that the LORD said to him, 'Arise, go down against the camp, for I have delivered it into your hand. But if you are afraid to go down, go down to the camp with Purah your servant, and you shall hear what they say; and afterward your hands shall be strengthened to go down against the camp'.” (Judges 7:9-11)

I was reading my Bible this morning and came across this while reading about Gideon and how God choose him, a non-impressive man, to lead the Israelites. At this point, the Israelites had fallen away from God and were worshiping man-made idols and not living in a pleasing manner to the Lord. God allowed different enemies to come into their land and oppress them so they would realize how important it was and is to have God as their God, their Protector and Leader. God brought Judges, like Gideon, to help bring them back to Him and under His protection.

In the story of Gideon, God used him, even though he was fearful, and always wanting to double check everything God said. It is so interesting to read how patient God was with Gideon. He allowed Gideon to ask for so many different signs throughout his entire service as a judge of Israel. He consumed wet meat and wet bread with fire from a rock that they were placed on; he answered Gideon's two seemingly impossible requests for the fleeces; and he explained many times to Gideon that He was going to save Israel, not the men who were enlisted to fight. He even whittled Gideon's army of 22,000 all the way down to 300 in order to show that it wasn't going to be the men fighting to save them, but rather He, their Protector, was going to save them.

What I found so encouraging about the story of Gideon is that even though God had already proven Himself to Gideon (even though He certainly did not have to), He was patient and willing to bring Gideon along in trusting Him. He knew Gideon so well and cared about him so much that even after He had already proven Himself, he basically said "Okay Gideon, here is the plan, but since I know you are still afraid, here is one more thing to show you that you have nothing to be afraid of."

I find this encouraging because when I become discouraged about something or feel as though I don't know enough, I can see how God encourages us when we are most down, lowly in spirit, and fearful. I have seen this before when doubts have crept in, and God quietly reminds me of something that I have learned or He shows me something new and I am immediately encouraged and charged and ready to deal with whatever I was worried about.

It is so good to have a Faithful God.

I feel this intense urgency

2010-09-03T10:56:00.000-07:00

It makes me angry and really sad that people make a conscious decision to reject Christ. I honestly do not know what to do. I've been learning a lot lately about the reality of what is going on in the world today. One thing can be certain: Jesus' return is soon. When I think about this fact and that there are people that I care about who have chosen to reject the only thing that can save them, I go crazy. It's probably not a good thing. I risk pushing them away but I feel this intense urgency to tell them they are making a mistake. This is not a time to be passive and watch as the world unfolds. No, it's time to get serious about doing things for this world, our country and it's people. It's time to get serious about making a Christlike difference in the world. Haha, it's too bad God has people like me representing Him - I mess up all the time and take away from His light. But still, even though Christians are human and are messed up just like everyone else, He still looks at us as His ambassadors. His representatives. The only we have to do is get out of the way and let Him shine. I hope Jesus will still be able to use me even though my fears of losing friends eternally cause me to perhaps come on too strong. I really don't care if someone hates me for a little while, if in the end they become saved.

I guess I approach sharing the Gospel in two ways. I love writing truth about Jesus and what I am learning about Him. This might cause people to be turned off though, but still I can't help but say all I can to show people that JESUS IS THE ONLY WAY and to encourage them to put their trust in Him. In public however, I still haven't learned how to walk up to someone and say "Hey, do you know Jesus - cause you should. He's coming back soon" without making it really awkward. I wish I could do that. I am confident though that God can use my actions for His glory, if I am focused on letting Him shine through me.

Anyway, until His return or until I die, I hope that I continue to feel this excitement about making a difference for Jesus. Nothing else will matter in the end.

Experts

2010-08-31T20:33:00.001-07:00

I'm not sure why some people who have done something for 5 minutes think they are suddenly complete experts on the subject. Okay, okay perhaps I am being extreme, but seriously when people act like they know everything about something others have spent a whole lot of a longer time studying, doing, etc., they end up coming accross pitifully. In my opinion, they should stop pretending like they are experts and actually focus on the matter at hand... Sure they can humbly share something they are learning about but constantly acting as they the have the wealth of information regarding the topic is dumb. Maybe after they have had some real experience, they can attempt to be the experts they desire to be and people might take them seriously. But until then...I wish they'd stop because I would actually like to learn from people with real experience.

Sorry for the mini rant...it just bugs me and has happened a few times recentely.

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New

2010-08-29T18:52:00.000-07:00

We've been visiting/attending a new church in Chino Hills. It's Calvary Chapel Chino Hills and man, oh man, I love this place. Every time I leave, I leave equipped and ready to go out into the world and make a difference. I think that is the point of going to church in the first place - to be equipped and sent into the world to be lights reflecting what Jesus has done in our lives. Not only does this church do that, but it also emphasizes being American and fighting for our freedom. I love that every lesson from Pastor Jack is filled with our history. It makes me proud to be an American. You don't get this everywhere. The result is that people are excited and actually doing things to bring our country back to the foundations that it was founded on as well as making a difference in their communities and local areas. Anyway, I am really excited to see what God is doing here and in Bryan and my life as we get fed here.

Dirt Bikes are my new favorite thing!

2010-08-23T11:00:00.000-07:00

This last Friday, Bryan, my brother and sister-in-law, Don and Rachel, all headed to Anza, CA to a place called MotoVentures for some dirt bike training. Bryan, Rachel and I, were all in the same class, but Don, who races dirt bikes was in a higher class so we weren't really with him. Anyway, our class was a lot of fun and we learned so much. We were all familiar with shifting through the gears and making the bike go, but the class taught us how to ride with a lot more confidence. By the end of the day I really wanted to trying jumping but, I decided not to until I have ridden a few more hours - but one day I will:) It was a really fun but exhausting day with family:) I can't wait to do it again!

Me and Rachel
Bryan
Me
All of us

Love and Respect

2010-08-17T11:20:00.000-07:00

A couple months ago, Bryan and I were able to attend a marriage conference by Emerson Eggerichs called "Love & Respect." It was really awesome and had some really helpful marriage tips about how to understand men and women. The concept, based out of Ephesians 5:33 (Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband) and is this:

"Love best motivates a woman and respect most powerfully motivates a man. Research reveals that during marital conflict a husband most often reacts when feeling disrespected and a wife reacts when feeling unloved." (Love and Respect, 2010).

This is really helpful to know as a wife. I took what the conference taught and this is what I came away with. My husband needs respect. When I genuinely respect him, he is motivated to love me. Even if he doesn't love me back, I, as a wife am instructed to respect him. This is how I love him. As a wife, I already know how to love him because I am female and that is ingrained in me, but to respect him, I have to work at that because I don't understand it. Once I realized that it was how I was able to love him though, it became a little easier to do. Basically, respecting Bryan, means not being negative towards him, not tearing him down, and supporting him in all that he does.

The love aspect for women, is much easier for me to understand and write about but I won't spend to much time on it. Basically, women desire to be loved and known. When Bryan shows me that I am the most important person to him and tells me that I am special and beautiful and make his day, I am inspired and fill to the brim.

The conference was really helpful and I would encourage people to go to it at least once, if not multiple times because it was that good.

You can check out the Love and Respect ministry here: Love and Respect. They also have a book that covers the material.

8 Months and my perspective on marriage

2010-08-17T10:21:00.001-07:00

After 8 months of marriage, things are still awesome (haha- I say that because sometimes people say "so do you hate each other yet?" and I always laugh because if you hated your spouse after so soon after the wedding, that would be ridiculous and you probly shouldn't have been married in the first place.)

What I have learned so far: having a good marriage isn't about how awesome of a cook or cleaner or whatever a "great housewife" is and how awesome your perfectly, wonderfully, handsome snuggle bear is at appearing to be the perfect husband to you, the perfect wife.

No, it's not about that at all. In fact, appearances on the outside shouldn't even be important - I should clarify - don't pretend to hate each other when you are out in public, when in private you totally don't. That's just stupid, even if it gives the two of you a snicker in private. Figure out another way to have fun that doesn't give everyone who isn't married the heebiejeebies about getting hitched to the love of their life because they are under the impression that marriage is the immediate death sentence to the relationship.

What I mean is, pretending to be awesome and pretending to be the perfect couple, when things aren't so awesome and perfect is not only a lie, but also stupid. If things are tough, just try acting normal and maybe divert your attempts at the appearance of perfectionism to actually working on your marriage. That whole "fake it, till you make it" theory, isn't going to work in marriage. It's more like "fake it, till you both hate each other so much and your life is in shambles" = depressing and no way to do a marriage.

Anyway, back to what I have learned so far about marriage. Perhaps it will change later, but I am pretty confident in this so far because it seems to be working. We are happy and our relationship is growing more and more each day. Like I said, marriage is awesome. I love being married to Bryan. We have fun together and enjoy being with each other. Neither of us is perfect but we compliment each other's weaknesses. That's what I think is the key to having a good marriage. Complimenting each other, being teammates and supporting each other in the ways that are needed. It's living a life of togetherness rather than tearing each other down and fighting for what you want rather than what is best for the both of you. Selfishness definitely can't be in marriage - it can be hard not to be selfish at times but in the end its always better when you work together. And when you find that you have messed up, it is always, always important to admit that you are wrong and try not to do it again. People, and specifically good spouses are willing to forgive when they know that you are being humble and truly mean what you say, when you say that you are sorry.

I guess if I could give some simple words that describe a good marriage they would be: commitment, teamwork, love/respect, and humility. I'm sure there are more words that would describe a good marriage but those seem to stick out most at this point in time haha.

The way

2010-08-07T09:16:00.001-07:00

Jesus isn't the best way to get to Heaven; He's the only way.

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Jesus or Hell?

2010-08-06T19:27:00.003-07:00

My heart has been weighing heavy with a hard fact to face. None the less, is vitally important for every person on this earth. It brings with it both joy and sadness. Joy for those who get it, and a grave sadness for those who do not.

Hard fact: you can choose to serve Jesus, or you can choose to serve something else - yourself, Satan himself, etc. If you choose anything or anyone other than Jesus, you will go to the place that was created for Satan and his angels when you die from this world. You can choose Jesus, or you can choose Hell. There are no other options. And Hell is a horrible place of torment and destruction. It is a place of literal fire and eternal agony. But, you don't have to choose Hell. You can choose Jesus, because He's already provided a way for you to escape that. Him. Jesus is the Savior. And all you have to do is choose Him. And choosing Him is amazing. Not only does He change your life here on earth for the better, but He also is building the most magnificent place for His followers to go to after death, were we will be with Him forever and ever, with no tears and no pain. Life will finally be perfect.

But you must choose Jesus. There is NO OTHER WAY to Heaven.

DO NOT be fooled into thinking otherwise.

Follow Jesus and live.

One day I'll get a puppy

2010-07-28T14:45:00.000-07:00

So eventually, I desperately want to get a puppy to raise. I love dogs so much and grew up with them. My parents had a dog before my sister and I were born and I remember thinking of Tansy as a great playmate. She was a Lab mutt and was such a great dog, very patient with us as we grew up. Later, when Tansy was getting old, we were given Emmy, a Rottweiler puppy by some friends. She quickly became a special member of our family and was probably the best dog we ever owned. We were careful not to rough house with her and trained her when she was a puppy so by the time she was a little older, she thought she was our lap dog. What a sweetheart she was, but a protector too. The last dog we got, we named Bridget. She is still alive and I guess the best way to describer her is loyal - even though my family constantly jokes about not wanting her because when we got her from the pound, they told us she was a Lab pup, but she turned out to be something quite different- an Airedale mix of some kind. She is a good dog though.

Anyway, like I said, I can't wait to get our own dog. I decided to research some, even though we are a ways out from getting one (we need to buy a house first because we can't have one in our apartment). I really do not like little dogs who bark a lot. I've been around some that constantly bark or a aloud to bark all the time and its really annoying and rude to guests that you may have at your house. Also, it needs to be able to be good with kids. Some of my favorites are as follows:

Rottweiler (large, good with older kids and when brought up with them, medium energy, medium shedding)

Golden Retriever (large, good with kids, medium energy, medium shedding)

Brittany (Spaniel) (medium, good with kids, high energy, medium shedding)

Belgian Malinois (medium/large, good with older kids and when brought up with them, low/medium energy, high shedding)

Bullmastiff (giant, good with kids and especially when brought up with them, low/medium energy, medium shedding)

There are a lot of dogs that I like, but in reality we will probably just get a mixed puppy so it will be more of a surprise haha…

Friends.

2010-07-21T12:11:00.000-07:00

I must say that I am really thankful for my good friends:)

That's all.

Decisions

2010-07-16T09:45:00.000-07:00

As Christians, we should be serving the Lord. Both Bryan and I have been given the gift of music and have been using those talents to serve God by leading others in worship. I love playing drums and trying to get better so I can play well for Jesus; Bryan is the same with his guitar. We both sing, although he sings more often than I do. It really is a joy to serve together with my husband.

I guess what I am wondering is this: is it okay to take a break sometimes and just focus on getting fed from the teaching of the pastor (along with quiet times and whatever else)? The goal is obviously to get back into serving but what about transition times? Or should you just power through serving and figure out another way to get fed? It's hard when you experience teaching that has so much life and encouragement in it but it isn't at the church that you are plugged into. It leaves you feeling conflicted - deeply desiring to be apart of a church that has so much life, but not wanting to give up on the one that may need you more...

School

2010-06-28T10:00:00.000-07:00

School will never end... :( Ha... I am currently working on my Bachelor's in Psychology. I'm a part time student and have been for 5 years. I began my college education in hopes of getting my degree in criminal justice, but then after 4 years of that, I realized I wasn't ever going to be able to use that degree so it was useless to continue with that. When I started out, there was a really good chance that I was going to be in law enforcement, but then I injured my foot which has caused me not to be able to run great distances - I can get away with about a mile. Anyway, I have worked in the CJ field for the last 5 years, 7 if you count my 2 years in the police Explorer program, and I am pretty much done with it. I work with a lot of bad people and I'm kinda done with it... No matter what, you have to work with bad people - even if you are working for the good people, I have to investigate the bad. It wears on me sometimes. I am thinking that I will most likely end up working in an office, but in whatever I do, the psychology degree with help me a lot. Plus, I find it interesting and I seem to do well in it. So far I have taken just a few of the core classes for my psychology degree, but I have been given A's in all of them. It's funny that even though I hate school, I still do really well in it. Anyway, the next two classes I have are Research Methods and the lab that coincides. Hopefully, it will be a good class. We will see.

Husband

2010-06-23T09:58:00.000-07:00

I have been very blessed by my new husband, Bryan. We've been married for just over 6 months now and I must say that marriage is far better than I could have ever imagined. I knew it was going to be great but it has surpassed my hopes and expectations by so much. I attribute that to having a wonderful husband who encourages me and inspires me to be better than I am. He is a good leader and is very wise in the way he handles things. He is so patient with me (I make him practice a lot haha) and he is naturally calming to me. He teaches me how to respond gently to stressful situations instead of just reacting. I can trust him to make good choices for us. He has chosen to protect our marriage and puts it above everyone else. He takes care of me and I feel safe with him. We have a lot of fun too. We spend so much time joking around with each other and laughing which is nice:) Most weekends are like little vacations:) It's great!

Some people ask, in a joking manner but with a hint of sincerity, if I hate marriage yet. I think that is a despairing question to ask. I love being married to Bryan and I think a person has a choice in whether they choose to like being married or not. Yes, things can be difficult at times, but if both people love Jesus and are choosing to work together, it will be a blessing and most definitely not a curse. Thankfully, there are enough people who encourage me and say that it is still the best thing ever even after 30 or 40 years of marriage:) I can't wait to be married for that long with Bryan - I mean I love this period of our lives but I look forward to all the future stages of life we go through together.

So anyway, I vote "yes" for people to get married:) It's a wonderful thing!

Ugh - because I can't think of a better title.

2010-06-22T08:14:00.000-07:00

It's really hard to have hope that someone will change when they consistently prove that they are unwilling to change. It's not that they aren't capable of it, it's just that they repeatedly choose not too. They make excuses, they blame others, they say that no one has told them what they need to change, and they try to get others into trouble so they look better (tattling, gossiping, blaming, and telling lies about others are all included in this). In reality, they are completely to blame and everyone who has truly cared about them has explained exactly what needs to change. They just won't listen because they are too hardened and don't want to be held accountable for their actions and issues that have created the problems they are currently in. How do you have hope for someone like that? I mean that in all sincerity too - how does the Christian have hope for someone to change when you have been praying and praying that they will change, and at every corner and every turn they yet again, show how self-centered and reckless they are? It's like being between a rock and a hard place because I am a Christ follower and I am called to hope, and yet for certain people, I have little to almost no hope at all. Yes, I am aware that I need to work on that but seriously, how do you have hope for someone whose shown that they are hopeless? As it is right now, every time I think I might have a little hope that they will change, they promptly ruin that by doing exactly the problem that they need to change and it makes me like them less and less and it destroys their chance of ever repairing the relationship. And, I should add that it doesn't have anything to do with forgiveness. You can forgive someone, but choose not to interact with someone because they continually act inappropriately and are not a healthy person to be around. I guess the question I have is how do you not loose hope for them completely?

2010-06-21T21:55:00.001-07:00

Some people are idiots. Okay, okay to be nicer.... some people suffer from idiocity, self-centeredness, and stupidity. AKA they are unclassy.

Father's (and Mother haha)

2010-06-21T21:31:00.000-07:00

We had a fantastic Father's day weekend! We pretty much hung out with family the entire weekend. On Saturday, we went go-carting at a place called Fastlap. It was the coolest thing ever and soooo much fun! It was also cool because we had so much family there and we were all racing against each other (COMPETITION hahaha). My dad (Kevin), mom (Connie), sister (Sarah), grandpa (Ken) and his wife (Mary Jo), Bryan's brother (Don), his wife (Rachel) and baby (Emily), and Bryan's dad (Bob) all came. Sadly, we missed Bob's wife Margie - she had to work:( Anyway, it was the perfect group! It's nice that our families are able to hang out with each other:) Then, on Sunday, we went to a little BBQ at Bryan's dad's house and this time Margie was there haha. It was nice and a really pretty day. I like them all so much!

I must say that both Bryan and I have the most wonderful dads ever! Both of them are great men, who are kind hearted and love Jesus. I am so thankful for my dad because he did such a great job of teaching me about what a good relationship with Jesus looks like- oddly through discipline. He'd discipline me, but then he'd give me the hugs and kisses and cuddles afterwards which showed me that he loved me even though I had just been disciplined.

I am also so thankful for Bob (and Margie too!). Bryan has such a great dad. Bob and Margie are two of the best people I have ever met. They are both really wise and have shown me what it means to be hospitable. Yes, I am lucky to have them as Bryan's family and now mine:)

And since I forgot to post something for Mother's day, I have to add that I have the best mom too:) I actually think we have grown a lot closer now that I am married. She is someone who encourages me when I don't know what to do. She is a great model for me.

Well that's pretty much it for now. It's late but I wanted to write about the weekend because it was so fun with the best family ever:)

2010-06-10T15:21:00.001-07:00

This is a test from my phone.

The end

2010-06-09T11:27:00.001-07:00

I went to a funeral yesterday for a great aunt, I believe - I didn't really know her. I think I met her once or twice. My mom's family is huge so I rarely know who's who haha. Anyway, Aunt Peggy, as my aunts and mom call her, was a Believer. It was really neat to go to a funeral, something that is sad, but have the hope of the Gospel shared throughout the funeral and graveside service. It was really cool because a lot of our family doesn't know Jesus on a personal level which is really sad, but they all got to hear the Gospel through this woman's earthly life story and her heavenly story. The pastor did a great job in encouraging everyone, explaining that although we miss her and she loved all of us very much, she is far happier in Heaven than here on earth. He did a great job of explaining that we who have accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior will see her again and encouraged those who haven't accepted Jesus yet, to do it right away. It was neat. It was also really cool to see the impact that this woman had made on her family and friends. I could easily see that she had loved and cared for everyone she met, no matter who they were or what they believed. She had lived a life that mimicked Christ's. That's an awesome legacy. As I sat there, I couldn't help but feel like I had missed out on interacting with an amazing woman.

It's cool to think that as we live lives that have the sweat aroma of Christ in them, we can influence people all around us and even those who aren't, like me with Aunt Peggy. I didn't know her, but I was encouraged by her life and testimony. I hope that I can have that effect on others by the time I die too.

Fun times

2010-06-07T11:21:00.000-07:00

We had a really nice weekend. We went to some friends house up in Ventura and had a great time hanging out with them and their little Golden Retriever puppy! I want one soooo bad!!!!! I love puppies so much but we can't have one in our apartment. Especially not a puppy that will turn into a big dog haha. Anyway, it was a refreshing weekend:)

This is Ruby:)

Insanity

2010-06-02T15:11:00.000-07:00

Someone said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over but expecting different results. I find it hard to feel any sympathy for people who are having problems with relationships but refuse to change, expecting everyone to change for them all while playing the "poor me" card to whomever will give them a second of their day. First off, I can't stand people who play the "poor me" card - everyone else deals with life; get a grip and stop being a baby and deal with yours. Second, it's sad when people have pushed everyone away from themselves because of their own bad behavior, but still, sometimes people destroy their own lives just because they aren't willing to take responsibility for their own self and want to keep blaming everyone else for their misfortune which is why I don't really feel sorry for them. Like the definition above says, you can't do the same thing and expect things to be different and get mad at everyone else if things don't change. Instead, I feel...maybe pity is the word - it's like I look at them and feel sad for the way they see their world, but I also feel embarrassed for them because they have done it to themselves. It's kind of like the way you cringe when you see a train wreck. It's to bad people can be this deceived. They spend their entire lives lying, treating others poorly, and pushing their way through everyone else, trying to satisfy their needs that can only be satisfied by God. Sure, they say they are Christians but they don't do anything out of their identity in Christ. Instead, they suffocate the people around them, trying to have people fulfill the needs and desires that only God can fill. Then when someone says "hey, stop that" they get beyond mad and blame everyone else for the grief that they have set up for themselves. It's a shame really.

Maybe one day, they will stop, take a look inside and actually get real with themselves, God and others. Until then though, they will just continue on the sick path they are already on, wondering why things are the way they are.

Weekend/Unloading some thoughts

2010-05-31T20:38:00.000-07:00

We had a good weekend. It was nice to have a restful time together, after what was a really (I guess the best way to describe it) annoying week. Something to take away from this last week is that a married couple simply can not allow any other person or thing try to insert themselves inappropriately into their marriage. You have to protect your marriage by putting up boundaries with people (or whatever other things) who try to damage, or make themselves the center of your marriage or even too much apart of it, especially when they treat one or both spouses unkindly. (Actually, you put up boundaries with everyone, but some people need greater boundaries than other's, especially if they continually push the boundaries you already have in place.) A marriage is sacred and when anything threatens it, it must be stopped, even if it is not pleasant to deal with. This not only includes someone who blatantly tries to destroy a marriage but it can also be someone who thinks they are entitled to things from the husband and wife that they aren't entitled to or puts unnecessary stresses on the couple. I didn't really understand this before; I mean I had some understanding of it, but now I really understand how devastating it can be and how much pain, frustration and anger that comes into play when someone threatens an marriage. Now, I have seen an example of this and will never allow someone to hurt my husband or impose themselves into my marriage (Bryan feels the same). You can't have people trying to insert themselves into your marriage when they aren't apart of it and don't have the same values you have. For instance, when you value your spouse but they don't and treat them poorly or when you value specific roles in the marriage and that person doesn't so they put down or try to influence other things. That is a huge mistake, and one that I hope no one does and warn people not to do- as if anyone really reads this. My husband is the most important person in my life and anyone who treats him poorly will not be respected by me, rather they will be pitied - scorned even. Tough words, I know, but seriously, I love Bryan and do not want him to be hurt, and I say that with such a protective spirit, no one should ever cross it.

Anyway, that was a heavy post...It's just been a long week and blogging helps me get some of my emotions out when I can't really do anything about them...

Oh life...

2010-05-28T18:01:00.000-07:00

I haven't really been blogging as much just because I've been so busy lately. I'm in school, working and running a house- an apartment but still a house, and learning how to be a good wife haha. Still, it doesn't matter how busy I am, God still want's me to learn stuff. I think right now, He is again, having me learn patience and long suffering. Why!? I thought I already learned this lesson but apparently I didn't...wish I had have because this stinks and would have been a lot easier - like it is for my husband, kinda. I mean that even though things stink, Bryan has a lot of patience and has the gift of long suffering. He really encourages me and gives me a really high standard to live up to - in short my husband is someone I really, really look up to a lot. I love and respect him so much! Anyway, having his help and encouragement is one blessing during this time. Also, my morning prayer time has been helpful - it carries over into the day when things get frustrating, I have been able to pray and ask for God's strength. It helps...

Anyway, hopefully God will give us a break this weekend so we can have a peaceful and relaxing time together.

Protective

2010-05-27T08:36:00.000-07:00

It is amazing how protective you get over your spouse when someone is rude to them and is stressing them out.

A Million to One

2010-04-16T09:27:00.000-07:00

I just saw a Facebook group that is called "If I can find a million supporters of God, I will become a Christian." I've seen them before and I always think the same response. I think "this is unfortunate, because the person who made this group is most likely lying, to themselves and to God." You see, if the only reason someone becomes a "Christian" is simply because they found enough people who truly believe in Jesus, I don't think they actually believe in Jesus unless their heart has changed. You don't become a Christian just because others are. You become a Christ follower because you understand that Jesus died for your sins and that He is the King and that apart from Him is an empty hopeless life, doomed to an eternity in Hell. Sadly, if the individual's group does get a million followers, unless he takes some time to actually think about God, who He is and what He does for us, and receives the gift of salvation, he won't be saved.

This is frustrating because there are so many people out there who try to make these bargains with God or others about their salvation. It's all useless. You can't try to bargain your way into Heaven. "Okay God, if you show me all of the mystery's of the world, then I'll believe in you." "Okay God, if I find a million people who believe in you, then I'll believe in you." "Okay God, if I can read through the Bible and understand every part of it, even though people spend years and years studying it and continue to learn more and more about it every day, if I can be the exception, then I will believe in you." "Okay God, I'm going to pretend you don't exist." These "bargains" are just excuses for continuing on living your life in sin, separated from God. You must believe in Jesus. It is based off of faith. If you don't have faith, you don't get to be with Jesus and you will be separated from Him forever.

Another part of the Facebook story, is that there are a lot of people joining this group. And although I believe they have the right motives, I don't believe it will actually do much good. The thing is, one person (or one million in this case), can not make another person believe something they are unwilling to believe. This is heartbreaking to those who have believed and wish for their friends and family to believe and enter the family of God with them. We want to scream and shout and beat them into belief...and yet, we can't. Talking to them doesn't do much good or any if they have already decided that they don't want to believe. You just end up fighting with them and they take it as an attack and that doesn't do any good either. Really, the only thing you can do for the person who has blatantly chosen to not believe in Jesus is pray. Pray that they will stop being deceived by Satan and his demons and other people who have also been deceived. Pray that they will be released from Satan's grip. Pray that their hearts will be broken and softened towards the loving hands of Jesus. Pray that they will come to know the Lord and see all that he has done. Pray that they will choose Jesus instead of death.

Maybe one day, they will see the Light and believe. If not that, then maybe they will ask questions with open hearts and not defensive attitudes. But it all starts with people fervently praying for them. This must be done out of faith because God doesn't make people believe in Him and there is still the possibility that those people will not believe in Him. I do think however that prayer does amazing things and although He won't make them believe, God can change people's hearts and bring them to a place where they choose to believe.

Faith and Hope

2010-04-13T08:13:00.000-07:00

As I was about to fall asleep last night, I had a thought that I thought I would share.

A faithless person is a hopeless person.

That might sound a little harsh but its true. If a person does not have faith in Jesus, they can't have any hope for a future and they will feel empty - hopeless. Even if they believe in a different religion or something else. It's as simple as that. You must trust in Jesus to have a secure hope. Hope comes from the Lord. Hope for a life after death. Hope for justification in this unjust world. Hope for seeing loved ones who have passed on before with the same hope as you.

I am so grateful for the hope that Jesus gives me. I have a great hope in my future with Jesus - hope means to look forward to with desire and reasonable confidence. Some may try to say, "well you can't be sure about that or you don't know that- you can't even be sure if there is a God." To that I say, "yes, I can- and proudly I might add. Not to be prideful, but to be proud of who my God is. I trust Jesus and He has revealed Himself to me many times and He is faithful. I trust in His promises and do not have any doubt that they won't come true. Some already have." My faith in Him has made me completely secure about my future - no, I don't know what will happen to me on earth. I could face many difficult things or maybe not, but no matter what, I do know that after I die, I will live with Jesus forever and ever. I can't even fathom "forever and ever," but I have faith in Jesus and know it is true. For that, I live a full, hopeful, and confident life.

Good Friday

2010-04-02T13:58:00.000-07:00

Just a few minutes ago while sitting at my desk, working on one of the many projects of the day, I heard a popping sound. At first I didn't really pay much attention to it but finally after a few minutes my curiosity finally forced me to my office window which points towards the San Bernardino Courthouse. I looked down to the street half expecting someone doing some odd demonstration in protest to a case being heard in the court-it happens often. Instead, I was surprised to see a couple hundred people walking down the sidewalk, lead by a few men dressed as Roman centurions, one hitting a drum.

"Oh," I thought, "that's cool. They are doing a demonstration of when Jesus was walking to the cross." I paused there at the window to watch, and I began to think:

"This is kinda cool."

"There's a lot of people."

"Oh, look there is the guy holding the cross."

"Wait, this is a demonstration of Jesus going to the cross."

"Hmm. It's about 2:00 pm now; I suppose they would have all been heading to place where he was crucified now."

"Wow, this is about the time Jesus was willingly carrying the cross to his death for me."

"Oh man, I've been busy minded all day and haven't even paid attention to the knowledge that this is Good Friday. I've just blown it off. 'It's Good Friday! Yay! Got to work now.' Ugh...I need to think about this day and it's reality."

"Thank you, Jesus, for dying for me."

Perhaps you may be like me, busy with the day, with your thoughts, maybe even problems you are having, but don't forget that today marks the day that Jesus died for you. Today, marks the day that He willingly gave Himself up, to a brutal and gruesome death as payment for our sins- not His. All because He loved us.

Thank you, Jesus.

Why do you believe in Christianity?

2010-03-19T11:24:00.001-07:00

It's not so much Christianity as it is my belief in God as the Creator, the Savior and the Redeemer of the world. I believe in God because without Him, I have no hope in this world and I am a deadly sinner. He brings peace and understanding into my life and has changed me for the better. Without Him, I would be a home wrecker, out of control, and a promiscuous, sad and lonely girl. My life would be a wreck. I can say this with a certainty because when I was just out of high school, I started to fall away from Christ and that is exactly what happened. I started to make some extremely destructive choices and it caused a lot of pain in my life and other's. When I turned back to Jesus and trusted Him with my life and my identity, I changed and my life was much better and more fulfilling. I wasn't hurting, I wasn't making the bad choices and causing myself and others pain anymore. I wasn't perfect but I was way better than I was when I wasn't following Jesus. Also, I was happy and joyful and completely secure because my identity was in Christ and not myself.

So for me, God, the 3 in 1 Trinity, is everything to me. God the Father is my Comforter has well as my Holy, just God, Jesus is my Savior and Lord, and the Holy Spirit is my day to day Help. God means that I have worth and a calling in life. That is to serve Him here on Earth so I can spend eternity with Him. Without Him, I have nothing -no hope for eternal life and much fear.

So I am a Christian but more specifically, I would say that I am a Bible believing, Jesus loving, Christ Follower, secure in my identity as a child of Christ purchased by His blood - a lot of people say they are Christians but don't truly believe in Jesus as their Savior. Christianity, is more so just the way my beliefs and life practices are best described because of my belief in Christ.

Ask me anything

Growth/Bible Believing Christian

2010-03-16T09:27:00.001-07:00

I'm growing a lot right now. I've been learning about how God wants us to have relationships with him but not fall into legalism or other "man-made" methods of Christianity. He wants us to love Him, follow His Word and have a relationship with Him. When we do that, we grow if we allow him to change us as we cooperate with His plans for us. Part of how I have been cooperating with Him lately is spending my morning drive to work in prayer. It has been a refreshing time and has really improved my daily attitude. My prayer time has flowed into the tough moments in my day when I am able to remember that I have God on my side and He is the one fighting my battles. I've also been going to two different Bible studies throughout the week and have been blessed by the fellowship with other Believers. Not only do we fellowship, we learn more truths in the Bible. Another thing that I have been doing is getting additional teaching through a radio station (K-Wave) dedicated to sermons from Calvary Chapel pastors. These pastors really give application points in the Word which is awesome.

Through all of these things, I have been getting firmly founded in the Lord and I am no longer timid about saying what I believe because I know it is true. I know some people may be offended that I would have the audacity to say that I know the Truth and the only way to Heaven, but I am not sorry and nor will I hide it because I have a relationship with God and He has shown me who He is through His Word and as He has revealed Himself to me in my own personal life. No one will tell me otherwise because I have seen and experienced Him personally.

I've discovered as I have grown in my relationship with God, that it really pisses me off (pardon my language) when people who profess that they are Christians, twist the Bible around to fit their own needs. It makes me angry and rightly so. How dare someone twist the Word of God - my Savior, Creator, Healer, Comforter, Protector, Teacher, Almighty God - around and lie about what it says. Satan uses them to deceive others into thinking that God isn't God and that He isn't the Savior of the world and that they will be able to enter into Eternal Life without Him. It angers me so much that these wolves in sheep's clothing are even able to do this. Satan is a jerk and I wish he didn't steal people from the life they could have by feeding them lies that will destroy their souls. It breaks my heart when I see people believing these lies. It's so simple to inherit eternal life with the Lord of All.

If you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. (Romans 10:9).

It is so simple... After you believe, God changes your heart and amazing things begin to happen. A life with Jesus is wonderful and is the only way to Heaven. It makes me sad to think that so many people are going to go to Hell because they are choosing to believe in things that work for them and the things that they want to do, instead of believing in the Truth. Again, some will be upset that I have written this, but why would I hide the Truth when people's lives are at stake. Sadly, people choose to twist the Truth or completely disregard the Truth in order to fit their wants instead of believing that Jesus is the only way to Heaven. For me, I believe in Jesus and my entire identity is based off of being His child and I will not hide what I believe. People can either choose to believe in the Truth too, or they can choose disregard the Bible and Jesus and end up in Hell. It sucks but it is true. And I can't make anyone believe the Truth, but I can certainly proclaim it everywhere I go, in my words and my actions. Jesus is the Savior of the World - believe in Him and you will be saved!

So those are somethings that I am doing to enhance my relationship with God and that last part was inspired by a sermon I heard last night about not being ashamed of the Bible and not believing anything but the Truth in the Bible. I am a Bible Believing Christian and I will not be ashamed of my God, Savior of the World.

Do you believe in God?

2010-03-12T15:02:00.001-08:00

Yes, I do. My entire identity is based off of Him.

Ask me anything

formspring.me

2010-03-12T14:58:00.001-08:00

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/brookebilicke

If you could look like anybody, who would it be?

2010-03-12T14:56:00.001-08:00

Me, myself, and I.....

Ask me anything

Created to be his Help Meet

2010-03-04T21:30:00.001-08:00

I like to read. I typically like fiction and inspirational/development/spiritual growth books best. I like to be entertained but I also like to learn things that will help me become the person God wants me to be. One that I am reading right now is called "Created to be his Help Meet" by Debi Pearl. This is a great book! It is about wives embracing and living their Divine calling to be their husbands Help Meet/Helper. I really like this book and would suggest it to any wives out there. I was given it by my husbands step mom, Margie a while ago, She gave it to me long before the wedding but I never had time to read it until now. I'm glad she gave it to me.

The premise of the book appears to be (although I have only read the first few chapters) that a wife's primary role in society is to be her husband's helper regardless if he is a good man or not. This is based off of Genesis 2 where the creation of man and woman is described. Here's the story:

Genesis 2:18-24

The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman," for she was taken out of man." For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

This is one of my favorite parts of the Bible because for me, as a wife, It explains who I am to be. It means that my identity is that of a child of Christ and my primary role in life before anything else (daughter, drummer, worker, student, and whatever other titles I may have), is to be Bryan Bilicke's helper. Genesis 2 tells me who I am to be and what I am to do and "Created to be His Help Meet" helps shed light on how to do that. Thankfully, I have been blessed with a good man which makes that easier, although in the future I am certain that we will both sin against each other and hurt each other's feelings (since we are sinners) and I will have to revisit my journal notes when my feelings are hurt and I don't "feel like" being my love's helper.

That being said, since we live in a feminist society where people work really hard at making women the same as men (as in, women carry the same roles as men aka providers, protector, etc) instead of different but with the same importance, this concept may be difficult to swallow. I myself am quite proud of, honored and treasure the fact that my primary role in life is to help my husband be the best he can be. No one else has that privilege and no one will ever take that privilege away from me as long as I have any say in it.

So "Created to be His Help Meet" is a great book that really challenges wives to live up to the role God has placed on their lives.

That's all for now. I may share more about the things I am learning through this book later.

Woman be Woman, Man be Man

2010-02-26T09:14:00.001-08:00

This is a rant so pardon my harsh tone.

I just read something that made my blood boil. In a wedding blog that I follow, a couple had a "non gender wedding" because they didn't like that some people can get married and others can't. This is in response to homosexuals not being allowed to legally marry.

I find two incredibly frustrating problems in the mindset that this couple had. First, advocating homosexuality and second, denying the existence of the different roles men and women play.

Now I am quite aware of the tender issue of homosexuality and although I do not wish to make those practicing that lifestyle feel condemned, I simply can not agree with it, both spiritually and logically. Even taking away my own spiritual beliefs, I still could not condone that behavior simply because of the biology of it. Physically speaking, men and women are made to "fit" each other. Men do not fit men and women do not fit women. Men fit women, women fit men. And that is all I will say about that.

The other point that I wanted to address and actually the main point for this post, although I felt I need to take a moment to speak about the first issue, is the "non gender wedding" or more importantly the non gender marriage this couple is going to attempt to have. Moving from the couple to the problem: God created men and women and by doing that he established that men have mostly masculine traits and women have mostly feminine traits. He did this so men and women could compliment each other and to become a complete unit together inside of marriage. For a woman to attempt to be a man or for a man to attempt to be a woman, is like slapping God in the face and saying that you can do life better on your own outside of God's plan. (God does call people to a life of singleness but I believe He still wants the individual to live in his or her gender role as God compliments them instead of a spouse.) I'm not saying that women can't work, but what I am saying is that in however you and your spouse choose to run your home, the man needs to be the leader of his family and the women needs to be his helper. My next post is going to expound upon the woman's role a little bit more. I guess in conclusion, men are special because God has given them a specific role to play in the family and women are just as special because God has given them a specific role also. Men and women are equally important because we each play a needed role. One is not greater than the other but rather we all compliment each other. People need to stop acting like women can be men and men can be women.

Since this is in response to a marriage, this note is more specific to married couples although single people can get some encouragement too.

Women: Stop taking men's manhood away from them. Let them be men. You always whine about them being little boys so give them back their masculinity and let them become men! Also embrace your femininity. You can still have fun and be adventurous but you bring something to the table that no man will ever bring into a relationship; the ability to be a nurturer and an amazing helper. Stop trying to control the relationship. Your job is to stand up side by side with your man and HELP him. And don't be fooled, he needs your help more than he needs you to do his job. Stop trying to be men. You are a woman so be a woman.

Men, excuse my language, but seriously grow a pair! Be the men you are! You can still enjoy things like cooking or shopping but be men and be responsible. Stop trying to lay your responsibilities, things that God has given to you to take care of, on your wives. You are men, protectors and providers, so be that. Take back your responsibilities; step up to the plate and do your job! Your role is vital in the relationship. You are the leader so it is your responsibility to lead, not follow. You are a man so be a man.

That's all I have to say for now.

A pleasant surprise for dinner

2010-02-24T20:52:00.000-08:00

Tonight I decided I wanted to make some kind of honey baked chicken...I wanted to try something new to add to our list of dinners. After a little research on it, I put together my own little receipt and it was really easy!

Here is what I used and did:

Pre-heat the oven to 375 degrees.

Prep time 5 minutes/bake time 1 hour.

Mix in bowl

1/4 cup honey

1/8 cup melted butter

1/8 cup mustard

1/2 tsp. salt

Put foil in the bottom of baking dish.

Brush glaze over both sides of 2 boneless/skinless chicken breasts in a baking dish.

Bake for 1 hour at 375 degrees. Baste top of chicken 3 to 4 times during the duration.

The chicken ended up being sweet but had a light mustard flavor to compliment the honey. Also by brushing the chicken with glaze on both sides at the beginning, it seemed to help keep the chicken moist. It was a nice dinner treat:)

Legalism and the Enabler

2010-02-22T11:16:00.000-08:00

In both of our Bible studies there have been a couple themes (that are really one) that we have been reviewing. The first is that Christ followers should not live in the bondage of legalism and the second is that we can't even be Christ followers without him enabling us to and without us cooperating with him.

The first point is in response to Christ followers often falling into feeling guilty when they don't do the "Christian things" perfectly every day. For instance: feeling guilty when you miss a quiet time, or feeling like you are bad person when you miss a Sunday morning service or aren't apart of a Bible study group, or feeling like a failure when you struggle with praying on a regular basis, etc. Don't misunderstand me - These things are all good and important to building a relationship with God and His Bride the church. Quiet times help provide one way (although there are many) for God to speak to us because it means we have set aside time to listen to Him. Bible studies and church enable us to fellowship with other Believers and encourage each other during our weeks. Praying is a specific way to communicate with the Father and helps build an open relationship with God.

What I mean is that a relationship with God does not mean being bound by a set of rules and laws. Yes, we live by Biblical standards because of our love for God however those standards provide us a freedom to live our lives without fear and guilt and do not put a heavy burden on us. Jesus says "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:28-30). God did not mean for a person to choose to follow Him and then live in slavery to Christian performance; and therefore a Christian living under the ropes of legalism is not living in the freedom of Christ. Instead, I am learning that as Christ followers we can only do what God enables us to do.

Second point: we can only do what God enables us to do. This includes how we live our Christian lives and how we build our relationship with him. Jesus says in John 15:5 "I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." Notice He didn't say, "I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and works really hard by himself to be the best Christian he can, then He will be a great Christian and bear a bunch of fruit." No! He said we can do nothing without Him. That includes cultivating our relationship with Him. You see, as Christ followers, I am now certain that we must simply cooperate with God the Father as He works in us. That means, saying "God, here I am. I can't do anything without you, but I can do anything and everything with you. Show me how you would like me to act and what you would like me to do; give me the strength to do it, and I will do it. I am willing." We can even pray that when it comes to building our relationship with Him! "God, I want you to work in me and I want to have a good relationship with you. Show me what you want me to do for my part, so you can do your part and then enable me to complete my part."

Making daily commitments can be a way of "doing your part" (like morning prayer time, or going to weekly Bible studies) but don't allow those things to become a burden and trap you into legalism. We are supposed to rely on Him and it can be as simple as that.

So those are two important things that I have been learning lately.

Some Wedding Pictures!

2010-02-18T09:01:00.001-08:00

They arrived!!! And I absolutely love them!!!

It was the best day ever!

Waiting for marriage

2010-02-17T08:46:00.000-08:00

This is an interesting post. It's more so to help me prepare for a little talk I'll be giving in a few days. Bryan, Sarah and I have been asked to lead worship for a ceremony our church does every couple of years called True Love Waits. Basically, it is a time for students in Jr. High, High school, and college to make a pledge to God and inevitably their future spouses to save themselves for marriage. I made this commitment when I was about 13 not fully understanding the extent of what I was doing.

I have been asked to share a few words as part of this upcoming ceremony in hopes of encouraging those making the commitment, because as Christ followers, we do believe that sex should be saved for marriage. I am even more convinced of that now that I am married.

Like I said, I made this commitment when I was 13. As a 13 year old, I was pretty innocent and didn't really know what I was committing to until a few years down the road when boys started being more interesting to me and I was bombarded with sexual content on a day to day basis through various things like the media. I realized that it was probably going to be a little harder to stay pure than I had originally thought because it entailed not only saving sex for marriage, but keeping my thoughts and heart pure too. I didn't date in high school which I think protected me from a lot of temptation, but I still struggled with keeping my thoughts pure and staying away from things and situations where I could be tempted to fail, and sometimes I did. Not only that, but living in a world where sex is made to seem like a carefree activity with no consequences, made it difficult to fully be excited about waiting until marriage. Sometimes, it felt like I was missing out on something that was really fun for no reason at all. Society throws sex everywhere plus biologically it seems like your body is working completely against you. So that was what I faced until I met Bryan.

Then it got even harder. Not only was I still faced with the old struggles which intensified like crazy, but for the first time I actually loved someone and I had a desire for him. Honestly, we were not perfect and fell short in some areas, but thankfully under God's grace we made it to our wedding night and did not have sex until we were married.

Here's the important part of all of this. I basically just described a really hard struggle that a person making the commitment to stay pure before marriage is signing up to face. Some may have a greater struggle than others but still there will be a struggle of some kind. That being said, having completed my pre-marriage commitment to sexual purity, I can now say that, that choice was for the best because on our wedding day Bryan and I made another commitment to stay sexually pure within our marriage and because of that we were able to come together and without guilt or fear we able to enjoy something God meant for a man and his wife. I can't imagine giving myself to anyone other than my husband and not experiencing an incredible amount of fear and insecurity because of the vulnerability you must have. God meant sex to be for marriage because marriage under His standards is sacred and meant to be a life long commitment. A marriage provides a safe place for a husband and wife become one and not have any fear because their relationship is completely secure. You can not experience that with any other kind relationship.

So as I continue in my new fight for purity within my marriage, I would encourage anyone making the decision to make the commitment to stay pure before marriage. Waiting to have sex until you are married is completely worth the wait, and I wouldn't change my choice to do that for anything. Because of that commitment I made when I was 13, sex for me is only associated with trust and a safe and special intimacy that God has blessed.

Honeymoon!

2010-01-27T08:09:00.000-08:00

Sunday morning we packed up and began our official "honeymoon" trip. We went on a cruise to the Mexican Riviera. Our ship, the "Carnival Splendor," stopped at Puerto Vallarta, Mazatlan, and lastly Cabo San Lucas. Apparently the "Splendor" is the biggest and newest Carnival ship at sea, which is not a surprise because the ship was massive!

We pulled away from shore Sunday evening right as it began to rain, and then we spent Monday and Tuesday at sea. We made it into the sunny weather but it was really windy on deck so we stayed inside most of the time. I kept getting cold but Bryan thought it was nice:) Being at sea the first two full days was nice because that meant that we were able to catch up on sleep and not feel like we were missing out on stuff. I think I had 3 naps on Tuesday haha. We slept with the door to our balcony open so we could hear the wonderful sound of the ocean and waves as our ship cut through the sea. Tuesday was also the day that we discovered the chocolate soft serve ice cream that was open 24/7. It tasted like Hogendaz's chocolate ice cream. Yum! I ate it at lunch and dinner pretty much every day after....and it was delicious every time. Bryan thought it was funny because one night my stomach was upset and he jokingly asked if ice cream would make it feel better and I pouted and said "yes." haha

Wednesday, we arrived at Puerto Vallarta where we swam with the dolphins! It was such a neat experience! We went to this place that was kind of like Sea World but more so focused on the training of the animals and got into a pool with 7 other people. We each got to take turns individually taking pictures with the dolphins and doing little tricks with them. The trainer even handed the dolphin a fish, who then handed it to us so we could take it out of its mouth and hand it back to him. It was amazing how the dolphin with many visible teeth and who seemed to be pure muscle, took back its fish so gently and slowly even though it was a treat. Then we got to ride the dolphin! She flipped over onto her back and we were able to grab onto her fins. Then the 700-900 lb lady effortlessly pulled us around the pool on her tummy - while she was pregnant:) It was amazing!

Then Thursday we made it to Mazatlan. We weren't sure exactly what we were going to do when we got there but we got off the ship anyway and started to make our way to the "Golden district" (? I think that was what it was called). We were told that was the newer part of the city. But as we made our way to find at taxi, we ended up taking a tour of the city with some other people in a van. It ended up being one of my favorite parts of the trip because although we were in a group, the van stopped and let us explore different parts of the city on our own too. It was like our own little adventure and it was really fun:) The last stop with the group was at this awesome resort where we got an hour long couple's massage! We were in a little dimly lit room with soft tropical music playing in the background and it was amazing. Both of our therapists found knots that they really worked on too...the only scary part for me was when the girl began to touch my feet and I had to refrain myself from kicking her because I am ticklish...she must have noticed though because she didn't touch them long:) After, we went on a walk on the beach.

Cabo was the final port that we stopped at on Friday. We didn't do much there except go to their main mall which was really impressive. It was actually one of the nicest malls I have ever been too and we bought a hat for me and scrunchy for my hair so I could wear it. Even though I already have about 5 hats at home, I forgot them all and even though my glasses have the transitional lenses in them, the sun was sooo bright that I needed the extra protection for my eyes so I wouldn't have to squint. Anyway, I love my new hat my hat. It is brown with green letters that say "PAWA." We aren't sure what it means though...maybe it is one of Mexico's name brands or something.

The other really cool thing that we did in Cabo was that we held a lion cub! There was a wildlife preserve booth along the main street as you get off the ship with a baby lion and she was so cute we couldn't pass up taking a picture with her.

Saturday, was the final day at sea before we arrived back to Long Beach on Sunday morning. A little after we left Cabo on Friday afternoon, we hit the effects of the storms in California, which meant we had some pretty rough seas all the way home. Bryan loved the ship rocking back and forth but until the Dramamine kicked in, I was a little worried about getting sick. The cool thing was that since the ship was rocking so much, people didn't really think to get into the spas since they emptied the pools (the water was literally pouring out onto the decks). That meant that we got to hang out in less crowded spas Friday night and Saturday.

In other highlights of the trip, the food was amazing! The first night we had dinner in the main dining room and the first thing I ate was a fruit cup appetizer that was soooo delicious! I have never had pineapple that tasted that good before! It was like candy and that began the start of me having fruit at every meal from then on- breakfast, lunch and dinner. We also had two wonderful wait staff, Emil and his assistant Mutsa, who were both so nice! We learned that Emil has been working on cruise ships for 5 years and he has a two year old little boy at home. Emil was quiet but seemed to really enjoy talking with us. We didn't get to talk very much to Mutsa but she was so nice too. She had a pleasant attitude and always asked how our day was and joked with us a little. I liked both of them very much.

Another highlight of the dinner experience was that two of the nights all of the dining staff performed two hilariously awesome dances to the songs "Low" (feat T-Pain) by Flo Rida and "Jai Ho" by A.R. Rahman and The Pussycat Dolls. It was really fun to see our courteous waiters dancing to "apple bottom jeans, boots with the fur" and it made my day haha:)

We had a ton of fun on our honeymoon and it was so good to be able to just spend one on one time with each other after the stressful final stretch to the wedding. I think we caught up on our sleep although I have to admit the last two mornings when the alarm for me to get up for work has gone off at 6:50 am, a little tear has dropped out of my eye as I have rolled out of bed to leave my husband to sleep for another hour...am I bitter?...yes. Not really, but kinda. It's more so sad to leave Bryan in the morning but in the end, I typically like getting up and starting my day anyway so it works out.

Speaking of working out, that is where I'll be headed later today. Finally. After 3 months of not going to the gym at all and this last week of pretty much only eating and sleeping, my body hates me and made me swear that I would go tonight. I'm looking forward to it.

Anyway, that's all for now...

Brooke

Wedding Recap

2010-01-26T16:03:00.000-08:00

January 16th, 2010 was pretty much the best day of my life. Everything for the wedding went exactly as planned, and if it didn't we were clueless. It was an absolutely beautiful day and we couldn't have been blessed with anything better. The sun was out and shining but like I was hoping for, there were some beautiful clouds out too. God really gave us what I was hoping for.

It was great to have our friends and family surrounding us as we made out commitment to God and each other. Tears flowed, well, my tears flowed pretty much throughout the day until after the Father/Daughter dance haha; Bryan didn't really tear up much although I am pretty sure I saw one when we first saw each other:) I was so overwhelmed by the emotions during the day. Primarily I was so happy that Finally I was going to be Bryan's wife and all I could do was cry. I was also suffering from the "daddy's little girl" syndrome which was harder face than I thought it would be. I love my daddy so much and am very close to him and this was something we have definitely never dealt with before. Then I was also faced with the "twin separation anxiety" :( Sadness. The Twinkies can't hold hands at bedtime anymore. We did that until we got bunk beds about the young age of 12 or 13 - no lie. We are CLOSE but for good reason we can't live together anymore haha. Sister Sarah wrote it well on my Facebook when she pointed out that she hadn't realized we wouldn't be in any kind of contact for 7 days. That has never happened before. That being said, she moved my bed out of "our" room within 5 hours after Bryan and I said "I Do" .....apparently she was excited to have her own room or something....And finally, I was already missing my mommy too. I think we have grown closer throughout the wedding planning and stuff :) So anyway, there was a lot of emotion.

The ceremony was awesome! After my dad and I sobbed down the aisle (hehe - we even had made a pact that we wouldn't cry but that went straight out the window as soon as the doors opened), my dad gave me to Bryan and the ceremony began. Shawn did such a great job tailoring our wedding to Bryan and I. He even mentioned Jack Bauer haha. More importantly he also incorporated our love of worship as part of a charge to us. It was great!

Then we had our reception which went by like a blur...What I do remember is that all of the toasts were very special, and it was fun to get to see everyone who was there, even if it was only to give a hug and say "hi." By the time we left, it was a smaller group of closer friends and family who wished us "goodbye." As we got into the car, we saw that our friends had put little stickers of pairs of eyes all over the windows in the car haha. It was a cute idea and we loved it! As we drove down the street we sang the song "Somebodies Watching Me" from the Geico Car Insurance commercial and laughed. It was a great and perfect day.

Blog format

2010-01-26T15:57:00.001-08:00

Booo....My blog template crashed and lost everything in it.

Thankfully my posts are still here.

Wedding Notes #20

2010-01-13T08:30:00.001-08:00

This. Is. A. Crazy. Week. Wow.

A lot has happened and my mind is completely scatter brained so that makes things interesting....I can't even say words correctly haha.

On a side note, the flowers are coming from the woman who does the Mitten Buildings flowers via my friends Laurianna and Bella. I'm looking forward to seeing them:)

That's it for now.

Wedding Notes #19

2010-01-08T11:52:00.001-08:00

We are 8 days out and there are still important things that need to be done.
We finally took care of the linens so thank God for that.
We need to find a location/house for the rehearsal dinner:/ Not sure what we are going to for that since there will be about 25 people I believe...
Tomorrow, Saturday I will be running around all day trying to get stuff done. I will be having a test run on my hair with Jenna in the morning which I am excited about! Then I will be moving all of my stuff over to the apartment. That's going to be interesting considering I'll be going through everything I own - it didn't seem like a lot until I started actually thinking about what it entails. I'm a little stressed to say the least. Basically I will just be keeping what I absolutely need at the house for the next week and everything else will be at the apartment. Then I need to go shopping for a couple things and later in the evening is the bachelorette party/dinner which should be nice. So Saturday for me is going to be extremely busy and stressful, although I am looking forward to my hair test run and the dinner. Bryan will be MIA as he'll be having a fun day with the boys so at least one of us will have a relaxing day. Why can't girls have golf days as their parties? Golf courses are always beautiful and with the green grass and fresh air...and hitting things...it only seems like the best idea for girls day out before the wedding...just to let off some stress...I could use a trip like that right now. At least we get a vacation after all of this. I only have to survive 8 more days and then I will be the happiest person on earth when I get to be Mrs. Bilicke.
Anyway, Sunday is when we really have to kick into gear. Any playing/down time will be over until we leave the wedding on Saturday haha. We will be doing the first round of shopping for supplies like plates and forks and stuff like that. Then we'll go to Costco on Friday to get the food and stuff that needs to be refrigerated.
Monday, I need to drop off my dress so it can be pressed for the wedding-I'll pick it up on Friday. I think Bryan will pick up his tux on Friday as well.
Also on Monday we will have our final meeting with Larry for pre-marriage counseling. We always look forward to those times with him. He's helped us a lot.
Then Tuesday I have a meeting and Wednesday and Thursday I will be cleaning and organizing the apartment from moving all of my stuff over. I really want the apartment spotless by Friday because I want to have a completely clean apartment for Saturday. We will be spending Saturday night there before we leave on our cruise on Sunday. I really like having a clean house so that is my goal. It actually isn't horrible right now but after I move all of my stuff over, I'm going to want to do a deep clean.
Then Friday, the day before the wedding - I don't even know what that is going to look like yet. There is sooo much to do on that day so I can't even think about it yet. I really just need to get through this weekend before thinking about Friday. At least Friday, I will have help since both the moms will be able to help- I think...right? :)
Then we'll have the rehearsal/rehearsal dinner and then FINALLY it will be Saturday. And FINALLY I will be able to feel normal again...I feel crazy right now so that will be nice.

"Dear God, if you could just fast forward the next 8 days and have everything done for me, that would be great. If not, I need you to hold my hand because there is too much for me to do on my own. Thanks=)"

Wedding Notes #18

2010-01-04T10:59:00.000-08:00

12 days! Thank goodness too because I might be going insane...there is still a lot to get done. Plus, I have been waking up an hour/hours early from excitement for the last week which seems to only be worsening as we get closer- booo to that. I would really like to be rested for the wedding:) We don't want Shawn saying "Bryan, do you take this exhausted woman with bags under her eyes as your wife?" haha

One of the things left to do is finalizing and making a CD of most of the music that will be played at the wedding reception. Corey is helping us by DJing (thanks Corey!) and hopefully Nate is going to host it (Nate, Bryan is going to ask you haha). Once we come over to the reception, we are going to have the toasts, tosses and dances right away so people can mingle, eat cake, or dance during the rest of the time. We are just having cake and some light appetizers. Anyway, we have to finish making a CD with dance songs as well as soft background music songs so Corey can play them and maybe some other stuff that he already has. We have to finish that tonight so we can give him the CD tomorrow.

Then my mom and I went to Michaels a couple days ago and bought the two vases for the bouquets in the front of the church. They are glass and we also bought some blue rocks that we can put in the bottom of the vases. I think it will look cool but I'll let Lauriana decide:)

In Happy news: We got a couch yesterday! Actually we got both a couch and love seat set! Bryan's dad, Bob, and his wife, Margie, were gracious to give us one of theirs. We appreciate it soooo much!!! They are very comfortable and much nicer than two recliners haha. Yay for couches! It really helped make the apartment look like a home! :)

That's all for now.

Wedding Notes #17

2009-12-30T10:01:00.000-08:00

This is fitting - it the 17th wedding note, and we have exactly 17 days left until the wedding:) Yay!!!

It’s been busy. And that’s the end of the post…just kidding…the last few weeks have been really busy though.

Saturday, we finalized the cake set up – Basically, Kelly asked us which design we wanted for the cake. It’s going to be awesome!!! All of his cakes are amazing but ours is going to be the best! Haha. And he has figured out how to make gluten free cake for me that tastes like normal cake which is also amazing! This has been confirmed by gluten eating friends:) I love the treats that they always make me:) I think they were secretly trying to make me fat with all of the wonderful Christmas goodies he and Jolene made haha. Then on top of that, my mom made this really good cheesy Italian casserole on Sunday so basically, I probly wont be walking down the isle-I’ll probly be waddling haha.

Last night, my mom and I met with Laurianna and Bella who are helping do the flowers for the wedding:) We are decorating really simply but need help with them because of my family's lack of craftiness haha. It was a fun little meeting:) We talked about the corsages for the moms, bouquets for the bridesmaids and me, and some additional little arraignments. The plan is to use white roses, calla lilies (I think that was what they were called) and add some light blues, like sweet pea flowers. I think they will look great! I mean, I don’t really know what they will look like but I trust that it will look great! Its nice to be able to leave it in the hands of someone who knows what they are doing:) Thanks Bella and Laurianna!

Then today, I ordered the tulle for the isle. It will be white and navy blue. It should look nice:)

Also tonight I will be picking up the Martinelli’s (apple sparkling cider) that we will be using for toasting. Once we come over from the church, we will have the toasts right away…still trying to figure out how that will work with the serving of them… You don’t think there are so many details that need to be figured out (or at least I didn’t) until you are actually being asked all the questions haha.

So I think that is it for now…

Wedding Notes # 16

2009-12-22T12:56:00.000-08:00

25 days left!! Today we went to the County Recorder's office in San Bernardino and picked up our marriage license:) Kind of a fun little outing - not that it means much right now, except that the wedding is soon! It was really easy. We filled out some information on a computer and then went to a window to deal with the clerk who printed everything out for us and made us swear that everything on the papers was correct to the best of our knowledge. Basically that meant saying "Yes, my current name is Brooke Ann Schumacher and it will be Brooke Ann Bilicke after the wedding."

The highlight of the trip was when the lady asked me to confirm something and I bent my head down to look at the paper closer, totally hitting my head on the double plated glass between us and the lady. It didn't hurt at all and I wouldn't have even noticed if it hadn't had been so RIDICULOUSLY loud! There was definitely a bang! which was only enhanced by the semi looseness of the window pain haha. It was like, "Bang! Rattle rattle!" The poor clerk looked bewildered as she asked if I was okay and still hesitated after I laughed and told her I didn't even feel it. It was a classic Brooke moment for sure.

Anyway, now we have the license so that's fun:)

2009-12-17T09:42:00.001-08:00

Looking back over this year, a lot of things are different than last year. I feel more responsible and ready to be a wife. I've abandoned a lot of my immature ways, although I still have a lot of moments haha. As much as I would have married Bryan at the beginning of the year, I am sort of glad we waited for a while longer - although I must admit that ever since we got engaged, this whole "not being able to live with the one you love" has become really old, really fast. I am extremely happy that we are only 30 days out from that.

This year allowed Bryan and me to learn about each other and truly prepare ourselves for marriage. I understand what it means to be a wife a lot more now, than I did a year ago. No, I don't fully understand it yet, and won't until we are actually married for a while, but at least I have some healthy views about what my role as Bryan's wife is going to be.

In this last year, I have made some new friends who are older and have more experience in life. I have been able to learn from them as I have watched them interact. I have been able to see healthy marriages and unhealthy marriages and have been able to learn what I want to do and what I don't want to do in our marriage, although I'll mess up and have to try really hard I am sure.

I've learned that a wife who is gentle and kind is a blessing - you can still be an extrovert, happy, cheerful and outgoing, and be gentle at the same time. A wife needs to submit to her husband and trust him as he leads the couple in God's strength. I've also learned that a wife's encouragement and her ability to root her husband on and help his as he takes care of the home, is extremely valuable. The team mate and helper role is perhaps the most important as a wife helps her husband succeed in the tasks that he does. Also a wife is like a shield for her husband and she gets the privilege of helping him stay pure as his eyes are directed towards his wife. A few couples expressed this to us as we interviewed them. What an honor - and Bryan will do the same for me. Another job a wife has is to create a restful home for her husband, a place that he longs to be at and is able to recharge from the stresses that he has. (Bryan and I will both be working, but my primary job is to be his helper so although we will both do things for the home, I believe it is my responsibility to make sure those things are taken care of through whatever means.)

Being a wife is a great responsibility and I am excited to be able to take on this incredibly important role as Bryan's wife. Hopefully, the things that I have learned this year will help me be a good wife to my husband.

Compatibility

2009-12-17T08:34:00.000-08:00

Bryan and I have been meeting with a pastor for our pre-marriage counseling. (Actually, we've been meeting with a couple of pastors and some older friends as well.) One of our homework assignments was to take a compatibility test, which we liked to refer to our "incompatibility test" haha (as a joke obviously). Anyway, we met with the pastor and learned that we were in the top group in the test ratings, listed as a viable couple! I guess there are 4 groups and if you are in the first two groups, you have great and good potential of being a strong couple. If you are in the bottom two groups you should work extremely hard on some stuff before getting married, you get married at all because it means you disagree on a lot of stuff and will have to work extra hard at being a good team.

So since we are in the viable couple category, that is really encouraging! It's nice to know that although we will need to work on our relationship to keep it healthy, we aren't working from a disadvantage by not being a compatible couple. We agree about most things and have the same expectations as well. I am excited to begin our life together in 30 days!

Wedding Notes #15

2009-12-17T08:26:00.000-08:00

I haven’t written in some time, but I have a good reason- I’ve been working very hard on school because I had two full semester classes crammed into 5 ½ weeks. It’s been a lot of work, but I think I might finish with A’s in both classes! Anyway, I am almost done with school and I have heard my notes are missed so I thought I would take a moment to give an update.
Basically, I have put planning on hold until I am done with my classes haha. Although, Bryan did write his vows on Sunday night and we picked out my wedding band and got ideas for his wedding band on Saturday. That was a fun outing. I am really excited about my wedding band – it’s a simple white gold band with a row of princess cut diamonds in the middle. It accents my engagement ring really beautifully! And for Bryan we are going with a Titanium band – most likely fairly simple. He is going to look great with a wedding band on! ;)
Also we have been receiving our RSVP postcards which has been great! I feel bad (not really but kinda) because I sent them out just a couple of weeks ago and didn’t edit the due date for the RSVP haha. So I assume we will be getting more late RSVP’s which is quite alright:)
Finally, today is such a lovely day. The air is clear, the sky is bright blue but spotted with just a few white clouds- there is snow on the mountain and the air is crisp. It is wonderful. That brings me to a prayer request – it would be awesome if the wedding day was like today! We don’t want it to rain because we have pictures outside:/ So please join with us and pray that it is sunny and clear outside! That would be the best!!!
That’s all for now,
Brooke

Oi.

2009-12-02T18:09:00.000-08:00

I want to be married now. 45 days is still so long from today. Come quickly wedding day; you are the only thing keeping me from my love.

More Engagement pictures

2009-11-25T20:38:00.000-08:00

Whew life has been busy. With working full time, and currently being a full time student on top of planning the wedding, I am tired 95% of the time. I am thankful for this 4 day weekend!

I just got the CD of our engagement pictures from Ally so I thought I would post some more of my favorites.

Rest

2009-11-25T20:22:00.000-08:00

Currently I am learning about how important it is to rest. Rich, the husband of Bryan and my husband/wife mentor team, has talked about taking Sabbath rests over the last few months. I never thought it was important nor did I understand why it was important to rest until now. Basically, God tells us to rest for a reason. One, it means that we have to rely on Him during the week to complete what needs to be done. Two, God knew that people would need to slow down and de-stress when life got crazy.
I thought about it and decided that it was important for me to take time to not do any work one day a week as well. This is so that I have at least one day where my brain is able to slow down. What had been happening was that because I am so busy, I hadn’t been resting on the weekends and since I hadn’t been resting on the weekends, I couldn’t rest at night once the day was over. Therefore, I remained in a constant high strung state and it has been affecting my personality and the way I react to different situations; I’ve been uptight to say the least.

I made the choice to at least rest one day on the weekend and at night if at all possible. My week has been going a lot better since then. I have to trust God to enable me to complete the tasks that I have to do and He has been faithful to help me. Also, even though last week was crazy hard, I still was able to feel rested at the end of the weekend by forcing myself to slow down. Once again, God showed me that He knows best.
Time to go rest now….

Wedding Notes #14

2009-11-16T16:24:00.000-08:00

2 months until the wedding to be exact!!!

Things are slowing down a bit which is nice. I'm in the middle of taking two Psych classes over the next 5 weeks so I am busy with that alone - plus I require rest haha. That being said the little details are still around...As far as the invitation madness, we sent most of them already and are hand delivering our last ones. Amanda says I'm supposed to write about the process of hand delivering the invites haha. So.....

It all started on the cool afternoon of Saturday, November 14th when my bridesmaids threw me a bridal shower. It was so much fun!!! It was great to see people I haven't seen in a while and celebrate with all the ladies:) We had an ice cream buffet and it was delicious! Anyway, knowing that I was going to see many of the people I was planning on handing the invitations to, I brought my box of invitations labeled "Hand Deliver" - obviously. It is in alphabetical order for easy location once I see the invitee:) So I brought the box in and then Megan took it from me and handed them out - I didn't have to do a thing! haha. Yes, my plan worked...I'm kidding haha. But really that's what happened on Saturday- Megan handed out the ones to the ladies who were at the shower. It was appreciated!

Then day two, Sunday, I arrived at church and walked in with just my Bible and box of invites. No purse-I needed both of my hands free for flipping through the pile of invites. I then proceed to hunt down- I mean "find" the people I needed to give invites too. I was pretty successful with the exception of a few people who don't go to 3rd service. We'll catch them next week while we are at church leading worship since we'll be there for all of the services :) So that is pretty much the end of the invitations I think... Bryan still has to hand his work invitations out, which isn't to much of a big deal.

Engagement Pictures

2009-11-09T12:57:00.000-08:00

Here are some of our engagement pictures! I love them!

Wedding Notes #13

2009-11-02T10:30:00.000-08:00

This was a busy weekend! We assembled all of the invitations and now all we have to do is label, address, stamp, and send them...that's the goal for these next few nights. My mom helped us with the invitations which helped a lot - it also was embarrassing for me to learn that I was the only one who could not make a ribbon bow....Yes, my mother was able to and so was Bryan, but me? Nope. I couldn't. ....so I put the ones that Bryan and my mom did into envelopes:) It was funny to watch Bryan and my mom figure out how to do the ribbon bow thingy as I sat helpless haha...
Then yesterday, Ally Brennan, took our engagement photos! It was so much fun!!! We took a bunch in downtown Redlands which I am really looking forward too seeing. Then we went up to Ford park and took some on the grass next to the pond=) It was so much fun and I can't wait to see the pictures! Ally posted one on Facebook for us last night, and I had to hold in my scream of excitement because everyone was asleep haha...although I did wake up Sarah to show her haha.

I love this picture so much!! First off, I love black and white photos. Second, I didn't think we were capable of taking a picture like this. And thirdly, Bryan is so handsome and this picture displays his handsomeness very well=)

Ally was awesome! (Thank you!!!) You can see more of her work here: http://www.brennanpictures.org/
It was a good day:)
Anyway, that is all for now...

Wedding notes #12

2009-10-28T12:08:00.000-07:00

Along with invitations, comes addressing the envelopes. I was certainly not looking forward to that until someone gave me the idea to just make labels (I’m guessing Bryan wasn't looking forward to it either, although we never talked about it:) Then I was worried for a bit that I would have to do each label by itself which would take forever, but then I found on www.avery.com some great templates that allow me to enter each name on to the one page and it prints all the different labels on the same page.

- let me take a moment to say, I don't use labels very often so I know this whole different labels on one page thing must be a really well-known concept, but I missed it my label making class haha-

Anyway, now I have most of my labels done and have one less thing on my list!

The template!

Wedding Notes #11

2009-10-27T13:57:00.000-07:00

I assembled the first two invitations today just to see how difficult they would be. Turns out, they aren't as bad as I thought! It will still take a while though since there are a lot. We actually will be using two different invitations. The first you have already seen in previous pictures. The other is a simple white invitation with a ribbon at the top that is slipped into an envelope thingy - see? My crafty words are just spilling out haha. I decided to get the other one because I liked it too.

The goal is to get them all printed and begin to assemble them on Saturday. I am hopeful that we will get them all done but it looks like it will take most of the day, if not additional days.

You've seen this one.

This is the other one.

Responding in the Spirit

2009-10-21T09:57:00.000-07:00

Last night in Bible study we had a good discussion. Bryan and I are in a Bible study group from church. It’s really cool because we have made some new friends who are older and have a lot to share from life experiences. (I really value people who have lived life for enough time to understand they don’t know everything, but they have enough experience to give good Biblical advice- like our mentors :) I appreciate them a lot). Anyway, we were talking about how there are things in the Bible that God asks of us, but it is impossible to do them without his help – so basically everything that he asks us to do, after all He says “apart from me, you can do nothing.” (John 15:5). The general topic that we talked about was about loving our enemies and turning the other cheek when we are wronged. God tells us that we have to love our enemies, and that is impossible for humans to do because it goes against our instinct. At least it goes against my instinct. Honestly, when I have been wronged or insulted, my initial reaction is certainly not to be loving but rather, instead I feel like I want to get them back or make them pay – I don’t usually, but still the thought is definitely shouting in my mind. It’s the whole “you hurt me, so I’m going to hurt you” thing. It’s an ugly and sinful part of me that I have to give to God. Paul, in our group, said that he did a Bible study on what it meant to “turn the other cheek” and what he found was that it meant that when someone insults you, you don’t allow it to bother you. After all, their insult, or opinion doesn’t matter – insults and mean behaviors do not come from God, because God doesn’t do things like that. The way God does things is explained by the Fruit of the Spirit – he does things with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. So when someone does something to you and it is not done in the Fruit of the Spirit, it simply doesn’t matter, which is why we are able to turn the other cheek and rest in the truth that God gives us – we are His children and His opinion of us is what matters and no one else’s. As we do things according to His plans, we are able to rest in Him even if men are throwing insults and criticisms at us. If God is for us, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31). It’s pretty cool knowing that, especially when you see it played out over and over again in your own life. When God is in something, he makes it work. God wants us to love our enemies, so when we are hurt and wounded by them, we are able to run to him and have him help us love them instead of reacting in sinful ways. God is the only one who is able to give us that gentle word that turns away wrath (Proverbs 15:1). As we live in Him, He helps us in times of trouble. It is a blessing to have God on your side.

In the last few months, Bryan has been a really good example of responding to tough situations by turning the other cheek and giving gentle answers. I have been convicted as I have watched him respond to some nasty situations with gentleness, when I myself have wanted to retaliate against the offenders. No, Bryan isn’t perfect and he does mess up sometimes, but in the recent months God has really shown him that praying before answering an insult or someone who has hurt him, has made the conversations go much more smoothly. As I have watched my fiancé respond to things in gentleness and with the objective to bring peace and resolution to different things that have come up, I am only more encouraged that I am marrying a man who will lead us well. His example has started to make it into my heart and I am starting to see the application value of turning the other cheek and responding in the Fruit of the Spirit in difficult situations too. That doesn’t mean that we aren’t hurt or we aren’t angry about certain situations but it does mean that we are attempting to allow God to work in us and help us respond out of Him and not our flesh. I’m just starting out so I’m definitely going to have to cooperate with God and let Him change my heart towards people who have hurt me but I am sure that He will give me the help He promises. Kind of a bummer because anytime I am learning a lesson, God always gives me opportunities to practice what I am learning- ugh I don’t want to practice this one….

I came across a verse in Psalms yesterday that was so encouraging – it said “The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to Him in song.” (28:7). I think that means that if we trust God to take the blows from people acting recklessly and in meanness, those who are trying to hurt us, or even those who hurt and act out unkindly without fully realizing what they are actually doing because they are blinded by one thing or another, He will protect us and we can still be joyful because God is in control. It’s comforting to think about when you are under attack.

That’s all for now….still learning things in the midst of wedding planning...I guess that’s a good thing??? haha

Wedding notes #10

2009-10-19T08:42:00.000-07:00

In preparing for the wedding I was not looking forward to buying the shoes. I mean:
#1 - I never wear heels
#2 - my legs will be shaky enough as is without hoisting myself up onto a small little stick that has a diameter of less than a 1/2 inch
#3 - I would like to make it down the aisle without falling down
and #4 - when will I ever wear white dress shoes again?

So I'm not exactly sure how it all came to be (I think I saw some awesome pictures, told Sarah and Monet about it, and then threw the idea out to Bryan???) but this is what I decided.

I will be wearing these custom made Converse down the aisle! I made them on the Converse web site. They say "NowABilicke" on the side of the shoe if you can't read it. The writing is in navy blue which will match my wedding colors too :) I am so excited! I have seen some awesome pictures of brides in Converse so why shouldn't I get to wear the shoes that I am most comfy in too!?

Here's an example of a beautiful bride in Converse - I love this picture!

The Converse Bride

So now my shoe problems are solved - I have white shoes that I can walk in and be comfortable in all day. On top of that, I can wear them over and over! Yay for me!

Wedding Notes #9

2009-10-14T14:22:00.000-07:00

I can guarantee that I probably won't sleep at all the week before the wedding! I will be so excited - I'm already getting giddy and we still have 94 days to go haha. First off, I will be finally be Bryan's wife and second, we are going to have an awesome honeymoon to begin what will be an awesome Christ centered marriage! I am so excited for it!

So, we are going on a Carnival Cruise to the Mexican Rivera. I haven't ever been on a cruise and am really excited about it because I've always wanted to! We will be on the "Splendor" ship (http://www.carnival.com/cms/fun/ships/carnival_splendor/ ) which is amazing! Bryan set it up so we have a balcony room which is sweet of him - he knew I would like spending time together there:) He knows me so well haha. I will most assuredly love spending time together looking out over the water in our private balcony. Anyway, the rest of the ship is huge! Over 3000 guests can stay on the ship, not to mention the 1,150 staff members. I guess the Splendor is the largest and most innovative ship to date in the Carnival line (their words, not mine). Kinda cool. It even has a mini golf course haha. And the pools! Wow - they look amazing! I can't wait!

We are also going to go swim with the dolphins! I don't think many people get to do that....at least I never thought I would ever get to do something like that! But my honey thought it would be fun for us so we get to!! What a cool experience it will be! We are going to have so much fun on our honeymoon! I can't wait!!!

That's all for now.

Brooke, for B^2 (Brooke and Bryan:)

Wedding notes #8

2009-10-09T13:59:00.000-07:00

Last night we met with Shawn Brennan and his wife Ally again. Shawn is officiating our wedding and Ally is going to be our photographer! Check her out at http://www.brennanpictures.org/. It is great to have them be a part of our wedding.

This week we talked about the ceremony - or at least started too. We discussed ideas and the concept, and Shawn told us to start thinking about it with specifics in mind... He also told us we are writing our own vows haha *scary!* But it will be fun too... That means I will definitely be crying through the ceremony, especially while Bryan reads his to me...I hope I can make it through mine haha...

Anyway, we would really like our wedding to be centered on Christ and the celebration of the blessing that a Christ-centered marriage brings to peoples lives. In the time that Bryan and I have been together, people have given us some great feedback about the blessing of their Christ-centered marriages. They admit that it is work but also stress that it is such a blessing at the same time. One friend even said marriage provides the most precious intimacy we can experience other than the intimacy we experience with Jesus. These messages have been so encouraging as we have high (and reasonable) hopes of having a strong and healthy marriage and are committed to making that happen by cooperating with the Holy Spirit who is the only one who will be able to guide and empower us to that success. As we follow the Lord and abide in Him, I hope that Christ will shine through our marriage. We know it is possible to have that kind of marriage because we have seen examples of it lived out. One example for me is my parents. Sure they aren't perfect (haha) but they certainly try and in my opinion have been a wonderful success for which I am deeply thankful – they hit 25 years this year!!!

That being said, we want our ceremony to be a celebration of the good thing that God has created and that we will begin to enjoy on that day. God said that marriage was good. He created it for a reason, and that reason was that it was not good for man to be alone. He created the woman to come along the side of her husband and be his helper. I am excited about having that role and take it very seriously. As Bryan's wife, I will have the ability to help Bryan succeed in the things that he leads us through- With work and help from Jesus, I can become the crown spoken of in Proverbs 12:4. I want to be a noble and prudent wife, one that brings her husband joy and favor from the Lord (Proverbs 18:22). I will definitely have to work at this, but it will be a joy for me to learn how to embrace the role God has laid out for me. Bryan will have the role of being the leader of our home. It is a great responsibility and I trust that He will do a fantastic job at it because he wants to honor the Lord and believes in trusting the Lord for guidance. We are a good team however we will become an even better team and be able to do things much better as we compliment each other in our marriage relationship. We are looking forward to each of the roles that we will take on when we say "I do." The negative opinions and views on marriage that we have heard only inspire us towards living out the design God gave us in His Word. The idea that marriage takes away a person's freedom or that the "ball and chain" effect begins the day you say "I do" is something that we are going to actively repel ourselves from – what a sad viewpoint and one that sets you up for being self-centered and unwilling to be transformed by God into the spouse and Christian he wants you to be? Marriage for us will bring incredible freedom as we learn to live out what God has in store for us and we are excited about that and want to joyfully embrace it. Marriage will inevitably make us more Christ like as we learn to be selfless and put each other first and choose to love each other even when we don’t feel like it, staying true to the covenant that we will be making to each other on our wedding day. It will also give both of us more freedom. As we live in the perimeters that Christ desires for us, we experience a freedom that is immeasurable and filled with joy and grace. That is the way God created it. Outside of His plan is pain and despair; inside it brings joy and blessings – even in the hard times.

So, we want to celebrate that in our ceremony – the joining of two Christ followers, following His plans for their lives as well as the joys and blessings that it will bring.

Wedding Notes #7

2009-10-05T16:37:00.000-07:00

Over the last 3 weeks, we have been attending our pre-marital classes at our church and so far it has been really enjoyable. Larry Shoemaker and his wife, Karen, teach the class and we have been mainly discussing how to handle conflict and have effective communication. Thankfully, Bryan and I have decent communication and do not argue often however it has been good to learn how we should address the conflicts that will eventually arise since we are both human and sinners. Yesterday, we talked about the Speak-Listener technique for effective communication. Basically, the speaker expresses his or her thoughts in short sentences, and then the listener repeats what the speaker said in their own words back to the speaker. The speaker confirms if the listener understood what he just said, or re-words it so the listener eventually understands what they are trying to say. Then the speaker and listener switch positions so the other person is able to express themselves as well. The last part of the communication is problem solving which basically means that both people get to work at being selfless and compromise to find a solution to the matter. This technique will be helpful to make sure we both understand each other when we aren’t agreeing on something.

Anyway, I think one of the best parts about the class is hearing the examples that Larry and Karen have shared from their own life together. It is one thing to be told how you should do something (“this technique is recommended), but it is much better to hear how it actually works in real life (“this is how we used this technique when we had a problem or this is a problem that we could have solved much better by using this technique). Bryan and I definitely have definitely appreciated Larry and Karen as they have been really honest with all of us in the class, have taken the time to share valuable information, and are rooting for our future marriages. Thanks to both of them!

That’s all for now…still working on the invitations...

Wedding Notes #6

2009-09-28T11:09:00.000-07:00

This week we have been primarily working at nailing the guest list down. I didn't realize how involved it would be (this seems to be a reoccurring thing)...addresses have to be found, the number of stamps and invitations that are actually needed has to be determined...thank goodness for Microsoft Excel. Without it I'd be having a hard time. We are also putting every one's name and address into a Word Document so we can simply print labels instead of hand writing every one's name. Yay for that. Call me impersonal, but I don't really feel like writing 300 to 400 names and addresses on envelopes and I doubt my fiance has any desire to do that either...

In my spare time, I have been doing some prep work for assembling the invitations. The invitations I picked out have this piece of ribbon with a little plastic thingy that the ribbon is fed through. I have been working on putting the ribbon in the clasps so when the time comes to affix the "decorations" to the invitations, we won't have to do that part too. "Crafty" Brooke is not having fun with this:)

What the ribbon and clasps look like before....

What the ribbon and clasps look like together....

What I look like while putting them together....

Wedding Notes #5

2009-09-21T08:29:00.000-07:00

We are registered at Bed Bath and Beyond now! Yesterday, we spent about 3 hours in the store picking out everything that we need. By the time we were done, we were exhausted! At least, for the most part, we like the same kind of things so that made it easier. There is just so much in that store and you have to look at it all! We still need to add a couple things online, but I think we covered most of it. It will be fun to see it all come together =) The cool thing about BB&B is that they have it set up for people to buy items online too, which is good because some of the stuff that we registered for may not be carried in the different store locations. And, they will actually ship directly to our house which is awesome! For some reason I thought they might require us to go to the store and pick up the gifts that were purchased online, but they don't=) Anyway, it was a fun and tiring day but I think we covered most of it!

Wedding Notes #4

2009-09-17T13:45:00.000-07:00

We have decided what the style/theme of our house is going to be.
We like tropical themes so we want to have the natural bamboo-like woods and colors like tans and browns, lighter greens, slates, and blues. (I also like splashes of darker accents, like espresso brown, dark blues (like navy or midnight), grays, deep reds and black.) For instance the plate sets that we are registering for are black with a bamboo strip on them.
Here are some examples of decor that I like and want to try to imitate...

Gluten free Soup!

2009-09-16T13:18:00.000-07:00

I am allergic to gluten which includes but is not limited to:

Wheat

Rye

Oat

Barley

Modified Food Starch

MSG

Mushrooms

This means that I usually can't eat processed foods because they either contain Modified Food Starch or MSG. Canned soups are almost always on the "do not eat" list but today I finally found one that I can eat!! Healthy Choices "Chicken with Rice Soup," "Beef Pot Roast Soup," and their "Vegetable Soup" are all okay for me to eat!! Yay!! These will be helpful to have in the future because they are the perfect amount for lunch and all you have to do is peel off the metal covering and microwave it!

Wedding Notes #3

2009-09-15T11:23:00.000-07:00

We have officially asked our friends to be in the wedding and are excited about the group of people joining us on our day:)

Here is an idea of what the color scheme/wedding party looks like...

On my side, Sarah (marine), of course is my Maid of Honor, followed by my friends Staci (serene), Megan (pewter), and Kristen(silver) :)

On Bryan's side, David is the Best Man (midnight), followed by Karl (midnight), his brother Don (charcoal), and Nathan (platinum).

(I was able to create this example using the David's Bridal web site tool called "Dress Your Wedding").

Wedding Notes #2

2009-09-15T08:48:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I bought the first box of wedding invitations from Michael's! They are silver which matches the lighter end of the color scheme. I don't really need to describe them though- just look at the picture haha. Megan and Jolene are teaching me how to use coupons at Michael's and look for the deals which is really helpful! Michael's is having a sale right now on invitations so I got this box of 40 invitations (including envelopes and response cards) normally priced at $39 for $29. I'm also on the hunt for the 40% coupons at Michael's for when the sale stops- I'll get them even cheaper then!

Now here comes the scary moment about the invitations: I probably should have guessed this because it is most likely common knowledge, but apparently the people who make the invitation boxes decided that the people buying them could put them together.......so I have a box of invitations that some how we have to put together.....and I am the least crafty person on the planet. Hopefully it will be easy?

We will see....Maybe God will bless me with some craftiness for the next 4 months????

Wedding notes #1

2009-09-10T08:35:00.000-07:00

It's exciting to think that in 128 days I will finally walk down the aisle to my love and we will be married. I am so excited to be Bryan's wife. I hope I am a good wife to him!!!

Since I like to write, I think I might post some entries on here about the wedding planning stuff. Wedding planning is interesting and not like I thought it would be... I'm not really sure what I thought it would be like but it is different than that haha... Thankfully I have a lot of friends and family that are up for helping with ideas and plan execution! Thanks to you all!

Critical things to be done:

The main thing that we have to do right now is finalize where we are having the reception. We are hoping for one place and have a request in, but we will see what happens. Hopefully we get it!

We also need to finish composing our guest list so we can start sending invitations out. I think I have my list done (maybe- I keep remembering people haha) and Bryan is working on his.

Things completed:

1. Date set:
January 16th, 2010 at 1:30 pm
....which means that at about 2:15ish I will be Mrs. Bryan Bilicke! =)

2. Location of wedding:
We will be married at our church, Trinity, in Redlands.

3. Pastor performing wedding:
Shawn Brennan

4. Colors picked.
The colors of the wedding are going to be blues and greys which will be really nice for our winter wedding.

5. Dress and tuxes picked.
I bought my dress a few weeks ago and we picked out the tuxes too.

6. We also picked out our wedding cake.
Bryan's mom's hubby, Kelly, is making it for us and it is going to be amazing!!! There is going to be a fountain and blue decorative icing designs on it.

7. Honeymoon booked.
We are going on a Mexican Riviera cruise - possibly on the Carnival cruise line???...Bryan booked it so I'm not really sure about the details. I do know that it is 7 days long and we leave on Sunday the 17th.

8. Pre-marital classes scheduled.
We are going through the pre-marriage class at Trinity starting Sept 20th, and we are also meeting with Shawn and his wife Ally too! We had our first meeting last night and already it has been helpful to start thinking about/re-enforcing important things! Thanks guys!

I think those are the main things right now... I'll try to post more later!

We are....Engaged!

2009-08-21T08:02:00.000-07:00

Engaged!!!!
Bryan officially proposed last night (August 20, 2009 at 7:52 pm)!!! So here is the story:

Earlier this week Bryan told me we could go on a walk on Thursday night and I didn't think anything of it because that isn't an abnormal thing for us to do. So last night, we drove to his old neighborhood off of Sunset Ave. in Redlands. We like walking up there and we have this really cool and quiet spot that we like to sit and talk at; it over looks all of Redlands and can be really beautiful especially at night with the lights of the city twinkling. So Bryan "decided" that we would go to our spot to start our walk. When we got there the sun was still up so the view wasn't as nice as we are used to because we could still see the smog- so we actually did go on a walk haha. When we got back to the spot, Bryan stopped us and we just stood there talking for a little while, looking out over the city like we enjoy doing. He was standing behind me with his arms wrapped around me and it was a nice quiet moment. We weren't really talking about anything in particular (mixed in with some talk about our future together), and we were joking around which made it a light hearted moment. Then he said "You know I don't really have to worry like other guys do about your answer, I already know you are going to say 'yes.'" I laughed and said "Well, I knew from the second day that we hung out that I was going to marry you - if that was what God and you decided haha." Then he kind of shifted and said "But I guess I probably should do it the right way [at this point he turned me around towards him] and do something like this [semi dramatic with a playful glimmer in his eye, he got down on his knee]." At this point I was laughing because I thought he was playing around and not being serious at all. But then....he wrapped his left arm around me and with his right hand reached into his pocket [I stopped laughing] and pulled out the little black case [I started to tear up] and opened it and said "Will you marry me." That's when I started to do the "laughing, happy cry" and apparently I may or may not have "suffocated" him when I hugged his head tight against me, since he was still on his knee haha. He pulled back smiling and said "are you going to answer!?" and I said "yes! of course I will" and then he got up and we hugged and kissed - me still teary eyed, smiling and laughing. Then Bryan told me that there was a party waiting for me at Matt and Megan's house so we would get to go see everyone. I guess Sarah, Monet and Megan, planned it and invited everyone. It was such a fun time and I was very surprised and blessed!

So Bryan once again was able to surprise me. He does that often so I am not surprised that he was able to surprise me with the proposal, even though I was expecting it haha. Every day I think, "there's no way I could love him more" and then I still get surprised when my love for him grows daily. How does that happen!? It is amazing! He blesses my heart every day and makes me smile and laugh all the time. He is kind and gentle and loves Jesus with all of his heart and that love is poured over me. He is a humble leader who wants to honor Jesus and I know that he is going to be the best husband. I love him so much and can not wait to be Mrs. Bryan Bilicke!

That's all for now!
Brooke - soon to be a Bilicke!!

Beautiful Sound

2009-08-14T08:18:00.001-07:00

I have decided that the most beautiful sound on earth, is when a group of Christ followers lift their voices in praise.

Patience

2009-08-13T09:45:00.000-07:00

Normally I blog about stuff that I am currently in the nitty-gritty of learning which is cool because that is how I process things and have break-throughs in my understanding of things. Today however, I want to write about something that I feel I have had the break-through on- at least for the moment since I will continue learning about this forever I am sure.

The topic: Patience.

Lesson learned: When you get to a place of being patient for something to happen, you come to a place of rest because you aren't stressing over whatever you were being impatient about.

God is good because He knew I needed to learn this lesson and although the process was uncomfortable, I am thankful that God has taught me some things about this.

The process: I'm not really sure if anyone reads my blog, and if people do, I don't know if they know me or not. If you do know me, you probably have heard that Bryan and I are about to get engaged - If you don't know me, I'm about to get engaged and am getting married January 16th, 2009 to a man who loves Jesus, who loves me and who brings many joys to my heart. He is a wonderful leader and I can't wait to be his wife and helper in life, even though I haven't a clue how to do that yet! (I'll will probably blog about it though as I learn very soon!).

Anyway, I have been learning a lesson about patience as I wait for my dear to make our engagement public by officially proposing. We have planning on getting married for quite a while and we have had an idea of when we wanted to get married since the beginning of this year. A couple months ago we picked the day and we've been planning our wedding for a couple months. We've picked our cake; the colors; the dress; bridesmaid's dresses; the location for the wedding and the pictures; flowers and how many we want; reception plans.... basically we've planned the whole wedding - and we've booked the honeymoon haha.

...but still, we aren't officially engaged. And although I have been okay with waiting for the engagement because I trust Bryan and know that we are getting married, it became really hard over the last few months because since we aren't doing things the traditional way (getting engaged and then planning the wedding), some people haven't been happy about us planning things before being officially engaged. It's been difficult because I want my friends to be excited for Bryan and I - his friends are and so are our other mutual friends and influential people, so why can't some of the people who matter most to me, do the same? (I do understand why they are concerned and I know without a doubt that they care about me but I have explained the reality of the situation and I wish that they would stop worrying about it because there is nothing to worry about.) Anyway, I became really impatient and anxious waiting on Bryan and that behavior took away the fun of the surprise and this time in our lives. Over the course of a couple conversations with some different people a few weeks ago, I realized that I wasn't being patient and that I was letting what others thought about Bryan and my plans, cause a lot of stress on our relationship. I went to the Lord and asked Him to help me be patient and spent a lot of time thinking about the things I know to be true such as:

Bryan loves me, wants to marry me and is going to marry me in January. I know this because he tells me often and I trust him. On top of that, Bryan is going to be the best husband ever. He loves Jesus and wants to serve Him. He is kind, gentle, understanding, and grace-giving with me. He encourages me towards growing in Jesus and making my own objective choices. And I love him with all of my heart and want him to be able to propose the way he wants to.

So after praying and spending time focusing on the truths, I felt at peace about waiting on the engagement. I have gotten to a place of peace by trusting in truth - Although it is annoying and a bummer when people question why we are doing things a little backwards, I am not allowing it to stress me out because I know the truth. The truth sets you free...

So the lesson in brief is that when you are having a hard time with patience, try to focus on the truth surrounding the matter and be at peace. If God wants something to happen, it is going to happen - if He doesn't, you probably don't really want it to happen since He knows best.

So for now, I am doing my best to be patient, and it has been nice being at peace while waiting. I know the ring is coming and I know that in January, Bryan and I will set sail on our honeymoon cruise and I will begin another huge learning curve about being a wife. I just hope I keep the lessons I am currently learning with me so I don't have to re-learn them!

The Fruit Checklist

2009-07-16T16:02:00.000-07:00

Something that has been impressed upon my heart in the last few weeks is the importance of living by the Spirit. Unfortunately this truth hasn't been in the front of my mind in a while. I guess the lesson of living in the Fruit of the Spirit hasn't popped up in a while and so I have let it fade into the back of my mind until now, when in the midst of a crisis on the home front. While desperately trying to address and fix the problem at hand, Bryan and I have spent a lot of time discussing how we want to run our household in the future. One of the things that has become increasing important to us is that we do our best to live in the Spirit. We have recognized that if we abide in the Spirit, we will have God's blessing because we will be living the way He has commanded us too.

This all comes from Galatians 5. This passage focuses on being free from sin through Christ. That alone has been a great lesson - I think I have blogged about it before. Basically the message is that through Christ we are free from the power of sin. We simply do not have to be a slave to it. When sinful desire arises, because of Christ's love for us, we can simply say "no" to whatever it be, and that desire has absolutely no power over us. What a blessing to have this freedom!?

That being said, we are sinners and we still struggle with sin. God knew this so He gave us some guidelines and "how to's" to follow so we can live in freedom. He commands us "live by the Spirit" (in verse 16 of Gal 5) and then He explains why by saying that if we live by the Spirit we will not gratify our sinful nature- when we do not gratify the sin nature, we live in freedom. He follows that up by explaining what living by the Spirit looks like. Here is what He gives us:

"22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control."

In nine words, He shows us exactly what to do to live as Christ did. Its a pretty good way to check how you are doing in life.

Some questions to ask in all situations:

Am I living in Love? (loving God and others; 1 Cor 13 defines what love is: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. )
Am I joyful? (is the joy of Christ's work in me?)
Am I experiencing peace? (is my heart restless and incontinent?)
Am I patient?
Am I treating others with kindness?
Am I doing good things? (what are my actions? what are my motives? Are they for me, or for others?)
Am I being faithful? (I'm a little unclear on this one- it could mean am I faithful to commitments?)
Am I gentle? (how do I respond to things? Do I fly off the handle or do I respond calmly and without a temper?)
Do I have self-control? (Am I able to control my actions? Do I think before I act and adjust accordingly?)

Anyway, these things have been good to think about and I really want to continue studying them and learning who to apply them well to my life.

That's all for now.

B

Haven't blogged in a while....

2009-07-13T11:44:00.000-07:00

Obviously I have had a blogging lull...
I've been really busy and haven't really had time to.
I've been learning some pretty intense lessons though.
One is about contentment. It has entailed recognizing that I don't have to want the same things in life that others what, recognizing the things that I do want out of life, and recognizing the importance of being content.
I'll probably get bit in the butt for this (haha) but I think I am doing okay with being content with the things that I have been given- at this very moment-that could change at any time and I could have to continue learning about contentment the hard way haha. I'm praying Jesus helps me not have to learn that way; I typically learn lessons the hard way and it stinks!
Anyway, I have noticed that discontentment is really unattractive. The constant drive for obtaining more stuff at whatever the cost, is not healthy. (Let me clarify for a second- Being blessed with a lot of things isn't bad at all; but I think when the drive to get more things or make more money becomes more important than growing in your walk with the Lord or building Heavenly treasure or serving others, that is when it is bad.)
Anyway, I want to try to be content with what God blesses me with. I think life is easier that way...

Philosophies

2009-05-19T16:03:00.000-07:00

I have been learning that our philosophies about different things affect our actions. In other words, what we believe, affects our actions. What is cool is that it is possible to change your philosophy about something and change your actions if you so desire. This is applicable in all areas of life and very beneficial to know.

For instance in our spiritual lives- if we are struggling with a sin or we aren't doing as well as we could be doing, if we change how we think about that specific issue, our actions will change too. An example of this from my own life is language. When I was younger, I went through a period of time where I had a foul mouth. I was 16 or 17 and for some reason didn't care about the language coming out of my mouth. It was a matter of my heart, my spiritual walk. When I began to have a heart change, I realized that a foul mouth isn't Biblical, and is extremely unattractive and does not represent the kind of woman that I want to be. From there on, I have significantly changed the way I speak because I changed the way I thought about my language. (Yes, I fail sometimes, but for the most part, I have had victory over my language).

Another cool way I have seen how a philosophy change can affect actions, is in my drum playing. Seems like a random thing, but I have spent hours thinking about how exactly I want to play drums (with finesse and skill) and amazingly, with little to none practice, I have seen my actions (the way I play) change.

What I am currently working on, is developing a healthy, Biblical philosophy about marriage. I want to be a Biblical wife and as I move towards that, I am working on how I think about marriage so when I am a wife, I can be the best I can be. When I become a wife, I will most assuredly continue to learn and seek healthy input about being a Godly wife. But at this point, I want to begin with a Godly perspective on marriage, so when I do enter marriage, I don't have to create my philosophies as I go threw the transition of being a wife. I'll have enough things to learn as is haha.
So some things that I am working on as I learn about a Biblical perspective of marriage are:
-Having a servant attitude
-Having a gentle spirit
-Having a submissive heart
-Having a teachable heart
-Being able to take care of a home
-Having an understanding attitude
-etc, etc. etc.
As I am developing my philosophy of marriage, I am studying Song of Solomon, Proverbs, and the passages in the New Testament that speak towards wives. I want to be the Shulamite wife and the Proverbs 31 wife. These passages have really helped me see healthy examples of Biblical wives. Hopefully as I enter marriage, these philosophies will pay off well and I will be that kind of wife, or will at least be on the road towards that.

Anyway, I just think it is cool that we can direct our actions by how we think. How does this affect you?

Learning/teachability

2009-05-19T15:22:00.001-07:00

I've been learning that to be successful in life, you have to be teachable. By no means am I a pro at this but I have at least learned that it is important and have been striving to be as teachable as I can and continue to learn things that will make me a better person. I'll never be perfect at this but I will work at these things diligently until I leave this world.

Life seems to be like one continuous class. You go to class, you learn something, you leave class and practice what you learned, you go back to class and learn more- over and over and over. It's the learn-knowledge and activity-knowledge factor. The problem is that some people decide that once they have been to class once, they never have to go again- they've learned it all and they are done learning. What I would beg for to be considered is the fact that if you stop learning, how on earth will you ever get better at whatever you are doing in life? It's like the statement says: if you aren't growing, you are dying. Do you really want to stay the same forever and be like a stagnant pond?

Why then do people decide that they know it all? It's completely unattractive. The attitude of "I know everything about such and such because I've done this for however long" is asinine. The person who thinks that they finally figured something out, is ridiculous. They aren't teachable and honestly, I believe they are simply stupid.

Did you know that the potential for a human being is immeasurable. No one can EVER know everything that there is to know. And yet- human beings still decide to live under their capabilities. We are the only thing on the planet that does not live up to their full potential. Sad isn't it?

Why is this? Why do we choose to live below what we are capable of? We don't take time to learn how to be better. We aren't teachable and we are prideful.

What is the answer? I think the beginning of this is:
Be teachable.
Continue to learn always.

If you're not...

2009-05-05T08:25:00.000-07:00

"If you're not growing, you're dying."

Interesting thing to think about, right?

Distractions and Preventing a Calloused Heart

2009-04-10T09:10:00.000-07:00

Today is Good Friday. To be perfectly honest I have been so busy and distracted by life that I didn't even realize that we were at this time of year until last night. I started praying for a heart change because my mind has been no where near the cross. That is sad. Yes, I have been doing the "right" things- I've been going to church, going to Bible study, reading my Bible, and singing worship songs, but I haven't been letting all of that connect with my heart. What a shame.

Last night I was convicted as I sat in a worship practice, listening to the music but not engaging it with my mind or heart. At the end of practice, the team was praying and I sat there realizing I was totally missing the meaning of worship and prayer and this time of year because I was letting distractions take over my mind.

I don't want to be a distracted Christian- one who does all of the motions but never connects with it because of "stuff." That is useless and something to repent about. It's a calloused heart - a hard heart - and we are commanded not to have hard hearts (see Hebrews 3:8 and other places in the Bible as well). We need to be soft hearted and listening for the Father even if we are busy. We should not become apathetic, merely going through the motions, but rather look for ways to connect with Jesus each day so we remain soft hearted.

Change doesn't happen over night, but this morning definitely started well with me being touched by the song "Before the Throne of God Above" by Shane and Shane. Later I was thinking about what I need to do in order to prevent developing a calloused and hard heart towards Jesus and His work, and God totally answered my prayer through my accountability partner. She suggested we read through the Bible together and we ended up deciding that we will read a chapter a week, apply what we learned throughout the week and then talk about it when we meet with each other. Talk about an immediate answer to prayer! I had just prayed about that and within about 30 minutes, I had an answer! Jesus is awesome! Reading through the Bible with her will keep me accountable and will help me to actively apply the Word to my life.

If the person who is reading this (if there are even people who read this haha) is feeling distracted and disconnected from Jesus, I encourage you to go to Jesus and talk to him about it and then look for specific ways to connect with Him. He will honor your efforts. He is faithful and wants to have a relationship with you.

That's all for now.

B

Blog for men

2009-03-26T09:37:00.000-07:00

Howdy,
From my previous blog "blog for women" (or something like that) I gave a link for Pastor Mark Driscoll's sermon notes on his sermon from 1st Peter on women. Here is the second part of that sermon, 1st Peter on men. http://blog.marshillchurch.org/2009/03/24/notes-marriage-and-men/ I really appreciate Pastor Mark's speaking to men and women. This sermon was great and I hope you all can appreciate it too.

Life and Eternity

2009-03-24T12:39:00.000-07:00

Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life.

Follow Him. Love Him. Desire Him. Worship Him.

Choose to spend eternity with Him.

Life here without Him is worthless.

Yet, we try to put worth on things of the world.

We desire things. We worship things. Money, cars, houses, clothes, etc.

These things themselves aren't bad. It is perfectly fine to have all of it- to be wealthy-to have things. Money after all can allow freedom to live comfortably and serve others and give God glory by what we do with our money.

But when we worship things of this world instead of the Creator of this world- something is wrong.

Living a life centered on the things of this world is worthless.

Nothing from here will go with us when we die.

When we die, there is only one of two places we will go- Heaven or Hell. You don't get Hell and then Heaven. You get one, or the other.

Jesus or the world and Satan?

Pick one. You can't have both.

I encourage all to pick Jesus. He is God and He wants to spend eternity with you.

I would urge you pick immediately. Jesus is coming back soon. He is coming for His people and isn't going to wait for anyone to make up their mind about following Him or the world.

He is coming.

Follow Jesus.

A blog for wives

2009-03-18T16:50:00.000-07:00

I read the blog for Mars Hill church up in Seattle along with the teaching pastor's blog (Mark Driscoll). This week there was a blog posted regarding wives in response to this week's sermon. I love Driscoll's teaching on marriage and the different roles that husbands and wives take. He is direct and tells it like it is. This week he covered wives submitting in 1st Peter. Here is the link to the blog - http://blog.marshillchurch.org/2009/03/17/notes-marriage-and-women/. He will be speaking to the men next week.

He's Coming

2009-03-10T09:10:00.000-07:00

People.
Jesus is coming.
Soon.
It's going to be big and awesome.

Are you ready?